Basically...The funda is..

7-Aum Arivu – The Seventh (Non)Sense

2011-10-27T16:58:00.001+05:30

- The first thing that struck me while watching the movie was how Bodhi Dharman can kick Ra. One and G. One’s ass if he was alive (and kicking, of course) in 2050. While the latter two had tonnes of superhero powers heaped on them through programming and knew only how to fight and kill, Bodhi Dharman knew how to save lives as well. Besides, if you could get others to do the killing and fighting through the power of your eyes, you don’t even need to throw all those water balloons at the fire balls like Ra. One and G.One do.

- The Chinese government’s intelligence HQ conveys top secret information to an Indian scientist through Gmail. This is a political statement like none other and puts into context the biggest war of the 21st century – Google and China vs Privacy.

- Circular referencing on Wiki is perhaps the next big tool to convince the masses that the content of the film is true. By actually showing the Wiki page for Bodhi Dharman on the screen as research material for the movie, Murugadoss dares us to disprove the facts in the movie. So, next time you are shooting a historical, make sure you edit the Wiki page before the movie hits the screens, just in case.

- When Shruti Hassan talks about bringing back to life the skills of the ancestors past by activating the genetic memory, you begin to wonder if her genes suffered from selective amnesia.

- At one point in the movie, the ‘scientist’ explains how the next generation warfare will not involve physical combat at all and then in the scenes after the battle is fought between practitioners of hypnotism who battle it out just by staring at each other. Such nuanced writing has been absent from Indian cinema for a long time. Thank you Murugadoss!

- All Superheroes have blue eyes. At least both the ones releasing on Diwali this year did.

- When NR Narayana Murthy spoke about how the IITs no longer produced the same quality of engineers as it did before, everyone scoffed at him. Now Murugadoss reveals one of the systemic faults behind the situation – a cutting edge genetic engineering lab which is closed down for 18 days because it is summer vacation time. And we wonder why there are no top notch scientific thinkers in this country. Once again, thank you Murugadoss.

Har Ek Bill Zaroori Hota Hai!

2011-08-20T23:53:00.001+05:30

subah chaar baje call taxi ka bill

raat das baje dinner ka bill

mahine bar ka house rent bill

ek bill mein teen log cash claim kare

budget exceed karne keliye sign lena hai

koi Hotel Decent pe guest , koi Hilton mai rest

Par har ek bill zaroori hota hai

din bar goomne ka petrol bill

teen mahiney ka telephone bill

bus bill.. auto bill.. chai bill.. dahi bill..

cake bill.. coke bill..

bill real hota hai.. bill fake hota hai..

par har ek bill zaroori hota hai

Guys! Boss!! Boss!! Boss!!

Har bill Zaroori Hai Yaar!

Why should I care?

2011-08-18T08:38:00.002+05:30

I am a middle class Indian. And I can’t get myself to care about Anna Hazare’s present protest. I can’t help but mock at the participants in the many marches. The over-hyped candle light vigils are yet to make their presence felt in this campaign. But I don’t think they are too far away. Does this make me an unpatriotic cynic?

Friends in the course of conversations and on social media have urged me to wear a black band, change my profile picture to that of Anna Hazare and copy paste messages to showcase my solidarity for the cause. What cause, I ask. Fighting corruption, they say. But I raise a red flag. Aren’t all the protests about the Jan Lokpal? The response though is re-assuring. It’s all one and the same, I hear. Really?

My mind goes back to an extremely well made Tamizh movie called Ramana, where the protagonist sets up an Anti-corruption force to, as the name suggests, battle corruption. The force sets about kidnapping the top few corrupt officials from various government departments & killing the most corrupt one, setting free the rest. Corruption magically reduces as fear sets in in the minds of the government officials. In a remarkable final scene, the protagonist rejects an offer of pardon, saying that if he took it, he would be going against the very principles that he’s been fighting for & that justice should be served. I wonder if Team Anna had seen this movie. If they were anyways going to jail, they might have as well attempted to maximize their impact when out in the open. Or will someone else rise to do that job. Who will play Bhagat Singh to Anna’s Gandhi?

As I sit and ponder over these many questions, I realize that my cynicism traces its origins to events which happened two years ago. November 26th is a date etched in the minds of every Indian, for all the wrong reasons. The strong public reaction was a bright point, though. Rallies were taken. Peace marches were held. News anchors scoured over every single detail. There was widespread anguish over how the government acted in the whole episode. And less than 6 months later as the country headed to its next general election the whole nation looked to Mumbai to see which way she would vote, or at least how much she would vote. The results were shocking, again not necessarily because of who was voted in, but because so few were voting. The people just did not turn up to vote. Cynicism found its abode in my mind. Did we actually expect that the voter will wake up and make his way to the polling booth? This was right in the middle of the Indian summer, as against a much more pleasant climate prevailing in late November. The comfort of the air conditioner & the luxury of an unexpected middle of the week holiday was of course way too alluring compared with the onerous task of electing the next government.

When the whole movement against corruption was kick-started, the Lokpal bill was seen as a possible solution. It was but the backdrop against which a larger fight was being launched. The cause was exemplary, and the solution, acknowledged as not being perfect, was put up for discussion to refine it. All’s well till this time. Then the government suddenly froze and the opposition parties were in a quandary whether to support a bill which they knew would come back to haunt them at some point or let go of a Anna given opportunity to get on the government’s back. Anna’s team suddenly forgot that the elimination of corruption was much more complex than a single law & instead fixated itself on the Lokpal bill. Unlike corruption, which is fed by excessive give and take, in this fight both parties refused to budge. An uneasy impasse was created, and despite the flurry of activity over the past two days, the deadlock remains firmly in place.

So, would it be fair if I ask that in this fight between bloated egos & botched up government machinery, why should I be forced to take a stake?

1992

2009-12-30T20:10:00.004+05:30

The world over, obituaries are being written. The most common phrase in the cricketing world nowadays is 'ODIs are dead. Long live the T20s'. Sachin has proposed a master stroke (so named because it came from the master himself and for no particular affiliation to his suggestion).

In the midst of all this comes a humble suggestion from a cricket fan of 20 years (my age 23, take out 3 years, the time it took for me to learn what a television is). Bring us back the 1992 world cup! Agreed, I was just out of kinter garden and possibly am expected to know nothing about the World Cup. But, a little self defense before my credibility is questioned. Once, I faked illness to sit and watch the highlights of a match I had missed.

Well, now that my credibility issue is cleared, here are the reasons why I feel so passionately about that World Cup. It was the model World cup in all the senses. It had everything.

The jerseys. Coloured clothing for the first time and that was before the days when every square centimeter on a jersey was written off to a corporate giant. The design of the shirts could not have been any simpler. And the colours, the 9 participating teams had 9 distince colours. That wasn't an age when a slightly faded Sri Lankan blue shirt could be passed off for an Indian jersey and not all teams were crazy about getting green and yellow on their jerseys. A birds eye view would have revealed which two teams were playing and not some microscopic level research of jerseys to identify the different teams as is the case now. The customary start of the tournament pic featuring all the 9 teams is possibly the best of its kind.

The pitches. Australia and New Zealand were the hosts and one may not possibly need to elaborate more on the nature of the pitches. Long before sporting pictures became a hot phrase, this tournament was actually played on those. The variety of grounds in which matches were played is mindboggling. From the insanely huge MCG, in the times when boundaries were actually the advertising boards and not a 'sponsored' rope brought in 20 yards from the boundary to the lovely looking Wellington, the viewer was transported to a different world every single day. And yes, there were no standardised pitches, Perth was fast and Adelaide was the batting beauty it still is.

The crowds. Australia is possibly the most sport oriented country in the world and boy do they love their sports. And New Zealand proved that you actually don't need a billion people to fill up your cricket stadiums. It helped that there were so many day night matches, but my guess is even if every single match was played as a pure day game, the crowds would not have diminished a single bit. They were responsible for adding even more colour to the already colourful tournament.

The format. Nine teams. Each plays the other one one time each. The top four go through to the semi-finals. Simple, straight forward and so totally fair. The best teams who consistently won over the rest were the deserving semi finalists. No two ways about it. No unnecessary additions like a super eight, which as a concept still baffles me. The length of the tournament gave enough time for teams to come back from the dumps , as Pakistan clearly demonstrated, but not so long that the teams and the audience started to think that Wrold Cups had ceased to be a once in 4 year event but a 4 year event in itself.

The innovation. Much before Sanath Jayasuriya made a mockery of Prabhakar and hit Defraitas for a six which started from the Kotla and landed at the Red fort, an individual named Mark Greatbatch showed the world what one could achieve in the first few overs of a one day match. Slam wham bang was the only game this guy knew and not one person regrets it. And spinners opening the bowling? Whoever thought of that before. Dipak Patel and his captain Martin Crowe threw on the world possibly the biggest surprise of the past 2 decades and it worked seamlessly (pun may have been intended) as well.

The memories. Jonty Rhodes running Inzamam out. Javed Miandad jumping up and down to mock at Kiran More. Aamir Sohail kneeling down on the hallowed turf of the MCG offering his thanks to the Almighty at the end of it all.

The cricket. This was perhaps the biggest positive. Be it Jadeja diving full length to dismiss ~~Steve Waugh~~ Allan Border or Inzamam helping the cricket ball get acquainted with every single blade of grass, and a few spectators as well, with his blinding hitting through the end stages of the tournament or Wasim Akram showing the world what the whole deal about making the ball talk was, this tournament was perhaps the most complete entertainment package as far as the game was concerned.

The underdog story or maybe should we say underdogs. New Zealand and Pakistan weren't exactly expected to set the grounds ablaze. But thats what they did, and especially in their semi-final face off. Imran Khan taking pain killer after pain killer to lead Pakistan to their biggest cricketing moment ever. And what about South Africa? Just a year on from their international reappearance after a long break, they surprised and wooed us with their sensational cricket and they would have possibly completed the mother of all comebacks if not for....

The controversy. England v South Africa,22nd March 1992. Need I say more?

And yes, again. Need I say more?

The best I have watched

2009-12-27T23:44:00.004+05:30

The other day, ( I seem to notice that is how a lot of my posts begin and therefore the unwillingness to change it) on my way to a cricket match (which shall feature later) I was narrating to the fellow travelers incidents from various matches that I have witnessed from a seat in the cricket stadium. It is then that I realized that if I made the list of the top moments that I have watched it would pretty much be a compilation of the top cricketing moments of the past decade from an Indian perspective. Here goes the list, not in any particular order.

India vs Pakistan, Chennai, 1999

This is one match no one on either side of the subcontinent's Line of Control would forget for the rest of their lives. For the 40000 odd who were present on that fateful final day, this was one of those matches which came closest to satiating all the human sensory needs. The final day began with India looking set to push on to an emotional victory with two of their best batsmen in at the start of the day. One of them would last not too long and the other would not last long enough. One got out to a peach of a delivery and the other would deliver possibly the greatest innings in a losing cause. And in the midst of all this to add to the drama was what in gully cricket terminology was a 'one pitch' catch to dismiss Saurav Ganguly. As India lost their top order barring Sachin within 100 runs, it seemed like it would be a much shorter stay at the stadium than most of us had anticipated. This was until Mongia showed exceptional grit and in his company Sachin began to blossom. This was not so much an innings of booming cover drives and sweeps over midwicket for six, but instead it was a lesson in geometry. So well did Sachin work the angles that it seemed like no field set up could contain him. He repeatedly swept Saqlain, then the biggest threat in a super star studded Pakistani bowling lineup, fine to collect two runs. As the match seemed to drift away from Pakistan, the crowd started to get into the act. As Salim Malik walked back to his position at deep midwicket, the loud cheers from the crowd got his attention and in his typical nonchalant style he conveyed back to the crowd that it would only be a matter of time before Pakistan would regain control. And surely enough within the next 20 minutes, Mongia took the ugliest swipe possible to hole out to Waqar off Wasim's bowling. If ever there was a cricketing definition of kamikaze, this was it, except of course the fact that this was an act of stupidity and not bravery. Sunil Joshi was the next man in and his straight six into the sightscreen produced a thumping noise which reverberated around the ground. This joy was however to be short lived and in its place descended a pall of gloom. Sachin got out holing out to Akram at deep cover attempting a swipe over midwicket off a Saqlain doosra. What followed after that was a procession by the Indian batsmen, from the pavilion onto the pitch and back. India would go on to lose by 12 runs and this defeat would forever rankle Sachin and the rest of the Indian public forever. What followed that though was unprecedented. As Wasim Akram and his men somehow got a brain wave to take a victory lap, what must have been apprehension about the reception they'll get turned into astonishment. As the Pakistanis made their way around the ground, the spectators stood up to give them a standing ovation, in a gesture which would go on to heal the wounds of the past in a manner which could seldom be achieved through diplomatic measures. The power of cricket and sport in general to act as a healer was made evident that day.

India vs Australia, 3rd Test, Chennai, 2001, 5th day

India had completed one of the greatest test victories just a few days back and here in Chennai they were on the verge of completing perhaps the greatest come from behind series victories. India began the day needing to skittle out the Aussies quickly and Steve Waugh was the one man who was capable of tying up the loose ends for Australia and India needed to get him out early. And they did and quickly Harbhajan wrapped the innings up and picked up 8 wickets in the innings. The atmosphere was terrific as the target was not that big a challenge and India had plenty of overs to achieve the same. Each one sitting in the stands knew they were going to witness something special. And special it was. After SS Das had got out early, local boy Ramesh and by now Indian super hero VVS Laxman set the stadium alight with some breathtaking strokes until a terrible mix up did Ramesh in. After a flurry of boundaries Sachin would also return to the pavilion and the usual death like silence ensued. As more wickets began to tumble the hearts began to flutter. Chennai 99 was back to haunt the crowd. But at the other end it seemed like Laxman could no wrong and while he was there a sense of calmness prevailed until Mark Waugh decided to take matters into his own hands. Literally. Laxman pulled an absolute half tracker from Miller with a power he was unknown for. If I had been a little older my eyes wouldn't have moved fast enough to catch what has been the best catch I have ever witnessed in a cricket stadium. The ball had well passed Mark Waugh when with a full stretch dive Waugh caught the ball. All with his usual grace well intact. All hope suddenly seemed lost. India had done it again. After snatching victory from the Aussies in the previous match, they now seemed determined to return the favor. A couple more wickets fell. Surely, it was going to be one of those romantic stories with a tragic end. Harbhajan Singh strode out to bat and one sensed the script writer had it written to perfection. With Dighe digging in, India crawled to very near the finish post. A Dighe drive through the slips had Warne running after the ball at a speed not seen from him since he was a teenager. Harbhajan drove McGrath powerfully and just as the crowd thought it was all over, the ball would go straight into the hands of the cover fielder. Again, a powerful drive. Again straight to the fielder. And then it happened. For a second or two my mind went blank. I could see nothing, feel nothing. It was the same for the more than 40000 who had assembled that day. And then the stadium erupted. India had WON! They had beaten the world champions. And this day was etched in my memories forever.

Saeed Anwar, 194, India vs Pakistan, Chennai 1997

This was my first match in a cricket stadium and what an initiation it would prove to be. A contest with lesser happenings might have possibly meant I would never return to the stadium. This was a battle. Nothing less. India and Pakistan facing each other on the 50th year of independence for both the nations in an tournament aptly named the Independence Cup. It also meant it was 50 years since some of the bloodiest scenes witnessed in the Indian subcontinent. India had won the war at the World Cup the previous year and this was their chance for revenge. And for some reason Saeed Anwar seemed to have taken it upon himself to exact that revenge. I think I may be pardoned if I say I don't remember much else about the match apart from his innings. Shahid Afridi was supposed to be the danger man. The man most likely to cause utter destruction. So when he was sent back early, India would have safely assumed that they were not going to face a huge target. Anwar, though, had other ideas. Though his entire innings was brutal in its impact and beautiful in its execution, one particular aspect stood out. Anwar's savage attack on India's best bowler. In a span of half a dozen deliveries, Anwar had lofted Anil Kumble to three sixes in the long on and midwicket region. As Anwar got closer and closer to the world record, the buzz in the crowd grew louder. And as he passed the world record, I am sure for some time he would have thought he was playing in Lahore or Karachi for such was the ovation he got. To be honest, it would not be an exaggeration to state that every single spectator felt a tinge of sadness when Ganguly took a stumbling catch at short square leg to dismiss Anwar, six short of the first ever ODI double century, a feat no one came close to beating till February 24th 2010. More importantly, that day, I learned how important it is to appreciate good cricket and a great innings.

Sehwag 81 off 68 balls, India v England , Chennai, 2008

Seldom does an innings lasting 68 balls so dramatically change the course of a test match. And to think that the change of course took only half the 68 deliveries in the real sense is what is even more fascinating. India had toiled long and hard in the field that day. Dismissing England was proving to be much more difficult than had been imagined. Strauss especially was playing out of his skin and his century in both the innings looked like pretty much sealing the match for England. Through a combination of some reverse swing and inspired bowling, India managed to skittle out the lower order and a declaration by Strauss left India with seemingly a little too much to do. Through a couple of days in the match I had the opportunity to sit with the Barmy Army and it was an experience by itself. To see such a bunch of dedicated cricket fans and to witness their singing and cheering for their cricketers was a reassuring sight for a cricket addict like me. Through most of the fourth day, the folks in the Barmy Army had been singing and dancing and throwing taunts at the Indian fans. Until Sehwag started his blitzkrieg. The home crowd found its voice and the Barmy Army lost theirs. Brutal cuts, upper cuts and a lot more never seen before , never after seen shots were unleashed by the man. It seemed only a matter of time before he got to his century. But alas, he fell victim to Swann late in the day. As he trudged off the pitch, one felt that while he had every right to be disappointed, we the crowd had nothing to complain about. Tendulkar and Yuvraj would lead India to a famous victory the next day, but for once even the commentators and the match referee got it spot on in handing the man of the match award to Sehwag.

More to follow in Part 2!

Run Sachin Run!

2009-11-15T15:33:00.004+05:30

If my mind was a 800 TB memory dump with 400 TB of images, Sachin would possibly occupy 100 TB of that space.

Sharjah 1998 : Shane Warne is being taken to the cleaners by Sachin. Shane Warne decides to come around the wicket. Shane Warne barely lets go of the ball. Sachin is half way down the track. The ball lands up in the hands of one of the thousands of adoring fans in the stadium. The crowd goes mad. A nation falls madly in love. The love story continues unabated. No breakups. Little squabbles, yes. But fights, no.

Chennai 1999 : India chase 271 for what would be one of the greatest victories of all time. Top order collapses. Dravid gets possibly the best delivery he'd face in his career. Ganguly gets out to what is described in gully cricket parlance as 'one pitch catch' (or was it two). Nayan joins Sachin. Mind goes back to Nayan's counter punching innings at Sharjah which almost everyone else seem to have forgotten. Hope surfaces. Sachin cuts and sweeps and sweeps. The author of this piece gets ready to celebrate with the other 40000 at the stadium. Sachin goes for his first ungainly swipe, Akram pouches the catch. India lose.

Once in a while comes this player whom everyone wants to own. Someone who you feel so privileged to watch and you are so in love with that you would seldom want to get into arguments about that player for the fear of hearing anything negative about him. Our generation possibly got insanely lucky in that regard : Pete Sampras, Roger Federer, Tiger Woods, Micheal Jordan, Micheal Schumacher and our very own Sachin Tendulkar. Of the lot, Sachin is perhaps the least global and the most endearing of the lot. For 20 long years, he has enthralled a nation, gave them a reason to celebrate, an object to deify and he has done so without as much as a whiff of celebrity like behaviour. When I was a kid, somewhere I heard this silly rule that if an individual lives on the same rented space for more than 12 years, he has ownership rights to the space. If that be the case, Sachin possibly owns a billion minds and hearts by now.

In some senses Sachin is more than a genius, he is like a genie to all of us. You could almost hear him whis(h)per 'Make a wish now and I'll make your wish come true'. There have been failures, yes, but then, if the Himalayas were just a continuous stretch of land at an altitude of 8000 metres, it'll cease to be the colossal mountain range it is and became just a tall plateau. For long periods of time Sachin has produced the runs with his team in ruins. Harsha Bhogle calls him the 10 for 2 man. The innings at Cape Town in 1997 when in the matter of 2 sessions, Sachin along with Azhar made Donald & Co look like club bowlers remains fresh in the mind. That it took a blinder of a catch (Adam Bacher) to put an end to that innings is an indication of how impenetrable Sachin can be on his best days.

For possibly the greatest batsman of all time, some of the most enduring images come from his bowling feats. His dismissal of Moin Khan late on the third day at Multan to ensure that India finished that day firmly on top would do even Shane Warne proud. Perhaps his first big moment in India is his last over heroics in the Hero cup semifinal. Hidden in the many heroics of the Adelaide test (referred to as Dravid's test) is a 2 wicket burst by Sachin to ensure that a fighting stand between Waugh and Martyn was cut short. This is perhaps the story of the man. There may have been victories where he would not have contributed with the bat, but hidden somewhere in the subtext would be that critical wicket, a crucial catch, a contribution which would have turned the tide in India's favour.

Comparisons will be drawn with Lara and Ponting. About their ability to close out matches or their ability to demolish the opposition in a manner unlike Sachin. But those critiques are for later. This is moment to cherish what Sachin has given to the millions of cricket connoisseurs across the globe. Millions are not numbers easily associated with people, but then so not are 30,000 international runs.

P.S : (PJ warning) The inspiration for the title comes from a mix of two other title contenders : An Ode to Sachin and Odu Sachin Odu.

Shastri-gal

2009-06-07T14:32:00.002+05:30

(Four word : Very high PJ levels.)

Gotcha, if you thought this was about the secret liaisons of a famed commentator made much more famous here. Gotcha again, if you thought this was about the escapades of a not so famous and not made famous anywhere yet, gentleman whose web avatar exists here. Besides, he is the Shastry with the y. (Shastry, hoping a return favor for this plug).

This in fact is on a very sensitive topic which might start of a centuries long debate. This hopes to identify the reasons for a peculiarity prevalent amongst the followers or rather the priests of the two sects of Hinduism, Shaivism and Vaishnavism. Whilst there beliefs and practices are largely similar there is the small matter of appearance which has bothered me over the past few months. Why is it that the Iyengar(Vaishnavite) priests are so much more hefty and fatter than their Iyer(Shaivite) peers?

This , ladies and gentlemen , is a question which has resulted in much existential angst for me. Even Dasavatharam the movie presents a similar picture. Rangaraja Nambi is shown to be a strong priest who thrashes the meek Shaivites. Now, we all know how well researched Kamal's movies are and therefore I will take it that even at that age and time, the Iyengars were better built than Iyers, at least in the matter of priests.

I thought about it for a long time and then it struck me.

Reason number one (Raison d'etre) :

The butter. Poor Betty who bought bitter butter and then had to go in search of better butter. Had she been aware of Iyengar temples, her search would have ended right at one of those. With the ownership rights of Krishna and Hanuman, the two apparently greatest butter specialists in mythology, there is no shortage of butter at there temples. And to top it off, since Hanuman is supposed to be really huge and it is a custom to apply the butter on the whole idol, one can imagine the quantity of butter that goes into this process. And quite obviously, as every good human being knows, one should not waste any consumable item. Thus forced to act as good samaritans, my assumption is that the priests rather unwillingly partake the butter later, much to the chagrin of the many thousand devotees who possibly believe that it is the Lord himself who uses the butter up for his early morning toast.

Reason number two :

Money. Look at the Shaivite conundrum. They have to worship the God of Death and Destruction, while the Vaishnavites are to worship the God who is responsible for happy existence on earth. Now it is only natural that all Shaivites therefore are slightly apprehensive about praying excessively and appealing more than necessary through generous grants to the temples of the sect. The last thing they'd want is for Shiva to discover a major affinity for them and send his brother in arm , Yama riding on his buffalo , to their house. (As a slight distraction, one wonders if its time to change the buffalo to a bullet. Imagine Yama riding this bullet to force them to bite this bullet).

Reason number three : (Raison d'ethree)

Money. This one is because of an amazing myth which some mega-intelligent Vaishnavite had the brains to create. Lord Venkatesha who resides peacefully in his abode at Tirupathi, owes a hell a lot of cash to the money man of Indian mythology, Kuberan. Now as dutiful devotees, it is only too obvious that the best way to please the lord would be to help him repay the loan. Now, this is where the mega-intelligence grows to giga-intelligence. The man who started the story did not tell the world what the exact loan amount was. This meant that till the time Lord Venkatesha appears to the world and delivers a thank you speech for saving him from bankruptcy a la the US government and Goldman Sachs, the (poor) people will have to keep filling up his coffers.

Now with so much money, the most obvious thing to do would be to ensure that all the hungry devotees are well fed. In the honorable intention that no devotee's hunger should be left unsatiated, the amount of food cooked will far exceed the amount of food consumed by them. And again as good samaritans, the priests ... ( you know the story).

These people are my initial findings. I shall over the course of time try and dig deeper into this great mystery. Any additions from your side are welcome.

P.S In the extreme event that any individual reading this feels offended by my comments, I would like to state that the post was intended to be humorous and not offensive. For the rest of you who are offended by the lack of humor, I deeply and sincerely apologize. Ya right!

Gooooaaaaaaaaal ..

2009-05-28T16:48:00.003+05:30

Two moments in the Barcelona v Man U final yesterday showed why Barca are.. Barca.

One: Three white shirts surround one tiny opponent. Opponent is brought to the floor. Three white shirts are delighted with their little piece of work. The tiny one takes 0.5 seconds to get up and start all over again.

Two : One giant 'defender' and another heavy defender from the Blaugrana sprint full speed into the box. Their opponents.

Much has been said about Messi V Ronaldo and Iniesta + Xavi and I shall not add volume to that. But that said I do have to wonder about how the commentary during the match was so outstandingly partisan. It is a pattern which is been there for a while. When a non English team beats an English one, do not praise the winner but start condoling the loser. If an English team wins, the opponents don't even matter. I think I saw Ronaldo's face a dozen times in the moments after the match, Messi's : once. I hate to admit this, but Ronaldo certainly played like a champion, at least till he recklessly pushed Puyol.

And a couple of other thoughts, is it just me or does anyone else also feel that Barca are being praised a little over the top. For all the fluidity and at times mesmerizing play, this definitely wasn't Barca at their best. This was more clinical than captivating.

P.S : I had made three sporting predictions this year : Liverpool winning BPL. liverpool came second. Royal Challengers winning the IPL (yes, I actually did). They came second. And finally Barca winning the CL. So, its 1 + 1/2 + 1/2 on 3. Not bad eh?

Phew!!

2009-05-18T19:28:00.001+05:30

I promise not to do ANY election forecasts. Not for the next five years at least. No.

So, while the great Indian democratic exercise ends and the great Indian democratic circus is set to roll, here a few (no, not phew, that's just for the title) points to ponder.

1) While our neighbours are fighting battles to save their countries and there is a greater political instability in large parts of the world, we not only know who our next Prime Minister is , but also who the one after him is going to be.

2) Modi is no magician with a magic wand who only needs to appear in a place and ahoy! , everyone votes for the BJP. In fact, votes have disappeared right under his nose.

3) Kumari Mayawati and Ms. Jayalalitha , your planned flights to the capital are now ridiculed as flights of fantasy.

4) While on Ms. Jayalalitha, it is learnt that she has a bad taste in her mouth due to M&M s, DMK style. (Since I can't seem to find the link and the above may not be self explanatory, Ms J has claimed the DMK won, thanks to Money and Muscle power. Denials are hard to find though)

5) Continuing on the theme of tastes, Kerala has now become a Karela for the Left. (No puns about the bad tastes of the author will be encouraged)

6) And just for the heck of continiuing on the theme of vegetables. I wish we had the power to vote out television anchors. On top of the list, (if you are Tamizh and you watch CNN IBN and you are not a fan of the channel and I need to close this bracket) Sagharika 'Ghose". My (future) Bengali friends may now collectively exclaim ' Oh my Gosh! '

7) M Karunanidhi, has now managed to 'fast' track yet another of his family members into a prominent political post.

8) Mamata di has given the TC to the Left from Bengal. It looks like the Left has reached a dead end (the Bangalore kind maybe?).

9) A soon to be popular quiz of face book will be 'Which kind of a Gandhi are you?'. Here's a sample question:

1) You belong to ?

a) THE Gandhi Family

b) The GANDHI Family

c) The Gandhi FAMILY

d) The Gandhi Family

If you chose A , you are Rahul Gandhi

If you chose B , you are Tushhar Gandhi

If you chose C , you are Varun ~~Gandhi~~

If you chose none of the above, indicating an inner fear of Capitals , you are Gopalkrishna Gandhi.

10) Because I have this inherent preference for double digits.

My money is on XXX : Part Four, the Finale

2009-05-12T22:52:00.010+05:30

Well, this one's been like the proverbial Indian Railways train. Leaving in a hurry, sticking to the schedule till the small segment between the last but one stop and the destination, where there's a inexplicable delay. But then what matters is that the destination has been reached. Also, there was the little matter of SC banning exit polls and the need to avoid any legal hassles. ;)

The most defining reason however is that try as I might it was impossible to find the issues at hand in the remaining set of states. Quite ironically, the closer one gets to the Capital , the lesser seem to be the concrete issues in play. So , as D day gets ever closer, I present before you the final set of predictions.

Delhi :

A brief introduction : To use an American term, this is a swing state. Not so much because it contributes decisively towards the final standings, but more so because whoever comes out on trumps in this state has tended to take away the honors at the Centre. A quirk deserving of a historic city and capital.

Issues :

Sheila Dixit :

One of the , if not the only, Congress leader(s) who can rub shoulders with 10 Janpath. She managed to withstand anti-incumbency, not once but twice and it is her face that people will be voting for if they cast their votes for the Congress.

BJP honor at stake :

Having lost all but one seat to the Congress in the previous election, BJP will look to regain not just the seats but also their pride. Their task is not definitely easy, as evidenced by their staggering loss in the recently held assembly elections. However, national elections have a totally different flavor in this state.

Tytler + Sajjan Kumar :

Both of them were amongst the high profile Congress winners from Delhi and this time neither of them would be contesting. This might affect the Congress as Delhi has tended to vote by the candidate and not the party. It will be interesting to see if either of them created a strong enough vote bank to pass on to their successors.

My bet is on :

Expect the BJP to perform better than 2009. Predicting the winner for the whole state will be risky proposition. It will be 4-3. But who will be the one with the four is a hazardous guess at the moment, as is any prediction for the nation as a whole. It will be extremely interesting to see if the one who takes Delhi the state does indeed take Delhi , the capital.

Jammu & Kashmir :

A brief introduction :

A state perennially on the boil and in the news for terrorism, seperatist movements and occasional communal tensions. Though only boasting of six constituencies, the significance of Indian elections in these territories is beyond written words. Has the distinction of having elections in all the five phases, showcasing the difficulties and the importance of holding peaceful elections in this state.

Issues :

Amarnath land transfer row :

A issue which held the state captive for a long time has surprisingly remained out of public eye close to the election time. BJP will have felt that it would have done enough to get the Jammu constituency with its very high Hindu population under its belt, thus marking its debut in this state.

Sopore Killings :

This was an issue which dented the image of the Army in these parts and with the Chief Minister earlier promising complete justice in this case, it has the potential to become an emotive issue come polling day. However, if Omar does use this to his advantage, Congress which is likely to be the affected party will not to be too bothered.

My bet is on :

The National Conference will possibly take 3 seats, with the Congress and BJP taking 2 and 1 respectively, effectively making it 5 for the Congress from this state.

Punjab :

A very critical state for both the Congress and the BJP. For the BJP, this state has its most stable and one of its longest serving allies , the Akali Dal. It is for this reason that the NDA chose Ludhiana to showcase its strength.

Issues/Key individuals :

Manmohan SINGH :

Strangely, an individual who has been elected to the Rajya Sabha from Assam has become one of the focal points of the Congress campaign. The simple reason being that that person is a Sikh and the Prime Minister of India. By using him as their icon, Congress have looked to blunt the Sikh emotional monopoly claimed by the Akali Dal.

Amarinder Singh :

Another Sikh, another important leader but important in a totally different manner. While the Akalis and the BJP will look to exploit his corrupt image, Amarinder has been willing to take the back seat and do the planning for the party.

Sukhbir Singh Badal :

For the junior Badal, this election will be a test of his capabilities as he is likely more or less to lead the Akali efforts. If Akalis do perform well , it will be a successful show of strength from one of the many second generation family politicians.

Rahul Gandhi's laboratory :

Reports suggest that Rahul Gandhi has chosen Punjab as a testing ground for his policy of infusing more young blood into the political space, due to its high youth voter percentage. Though the candidates he has introduced are second generation politicians, it will be interesting to see if his strategy works.

My bet is on :

Expect the Congress to ride on a little bit of anti-incumbency, a little bit on the Manmohan factor and trump in 5-6 seats. Akali Dal might therefore lose a couple of seats and end up at 4-5 while the BJP would do well to retain the 3 seats they won last time. A 8-5 verdict for NDA vs UPA from Punjab.

Haryana :

A brief introduction :

A state which produced a swing, not as noticeable as Kerala or WB , but none the less crucial swing from the NDA to the Congress in the last general elections. From no seats in 2004 to 9 seats in 2009, this state provided a much needed boost to the Congress tally.

Issues :

NDA-INLD tie up :

INLD chose to contest the 2004 elections on its own , rather than in alliance with the BJP and paid the price by not winning even a single seat. By contesting together this time, INLD and NDA will ensure that the anti-government votes aren't split. The BSP will however try and play spoilsport.

My bet is on :

Expect a major boost to the fortunes of the NDA this time from this state.

NDA - 7-9 seats

Congress - 2-3 seats.

Himachal Pradesh + Uttarakhand:

A brief introduction :

Both of the states are those which rely heavily on tourism to set the cash registers ringing. Politically, neither have attained much national significance. While one is a fairly new state, the other has very few seats to make much of an impact.

Key issues :

BJP leaders :

The one commonality between these two states is that both the states are ruled by the BJP. Both the chief ministers are strong personalities and how much they will be able to avoid local anti-incumbency and highlight their achievements if any will decide how many seats the BJP can get.

My bet is on :

A fairly even split between the two leading parties over all.

BJP - 4-5

Congress - 4-5

Uttar Pradesh :

A brief introduction :

The home turf of the Gandhi family. Amethi and Rae Bareilly have seen the rise of more than one Gandhi.

The birth place of Ram, the cradle of BJP's rise to a big national player and home to its only Prime Minister.

The current stronghold of the "Dalit ki Beti".

A land of umpteen riches , if one were to believe Amar Singh and his "brothers" like Amitabh.

A state with a electoral history so rich that nothing that I can write will suffice.

And most importantly, THE key for any government formation with 80 seats.

Issues :

We'll take it party wise.

BSP :

Mayawati seems to consider this as pretty much a cake walk given the amount of time she has spent campaigning outside the state. Pretty much the single most popular politician in the state , she holds an 'unswayable' hold on the Dalit, BC and OBC votes. Along with her strategist-in-chief SC Mishra, she hopes to create a Lower Caste-Brahmin combinatorial vote bank which will pretty much seal the deal for her in the state. Innumerable statues of the CM herself have been unveiled in the state. Will it create a positive feeling on the voters as they go out to vote or remind them of ugly things remains to be seen.

Samajwadi Party :

It should be Samajwadi Parties going by the bitter infighting between the tall party leader Azam Khan and the glib talking, deal making Amar Singh. Things have turned extremely ugly and how it will affect the party is to be seen. Of particular significance will be the impact on the Muslim vote back, which is the SP's back bone in the state. Mulayam does not seem to have done enough to get all the momentum he lost to BSP in the previous state assembly elections back.

BJP :

From the high of 57 seats in 1998 to the abysmal low of 10 in 2004, BJP has seen it all in UP. The state unit seems to have lost all its strength and will be banking on high profile candidates to fetch whatever seats possible. Varun Gandhi's hate speech may just about win him Philibit, but it will cost the party in all other places. BSP, once an ally will think twice before extending a hand to the BJP for fear of isolating the Muslim vote bank. The loss of Vajpayee will hurt a lot. Not only is one sure shot seat gone , but also the energy of his campaigns and his speeches which won over the masses in state. Ram and Ayodhya no longer seem to entice the voting masses.

Congress :

What can one say about a party which can 'celebrate' its 25th year anniversary of any decent showing in a state which has been the election hone groud of its first family since independence. Totally disencchanted ground workers coupled with a total failure to grasp the changing social hierarchy in the state has ensured that the Congress barely reaches double figures in the general elections for the past half a dozen times. Repeated forays of its scion Rahul Gandhi, has failed to enthuse the voters and maybe even the workers. Will have to fight hard to retain any significance it has in the state.

Another issue which usually raises its head during election time in UP is corruption charges against Mayawati and Mulayam. However, with both NDA and UPA having to finally depend on the winner of this state to form the government at the centre, they are keeping quiet over these issues.

My bet is on :

BSP will ride on the wave which won it a massive majority in the state elections a couple of years back. SP will have to be lose quite a lot of states it won last time and face another few years with declined national role. Both BJP and Congress will have to work hard to retain even their existing numbers. BJP though might gain a couple of seats.

BSP - 43-47 seats

SP - 15-20 seats

BJP - 10-13 seats

Congress - 8-10 seats.

Well then, that completes my look at the key states, the issues that dominate election 2009 and my predictions for each of them.

Here then is the final picture :

A more clear and slightly more approximate party wise picture would be (click to view in more detail):

Now , if we are to consider the most natural allies (Congress-NCP) and the most natural non-allies(Congress-BJD/TDP), the basic post poll alliances would be like :

New NDA : NDA + BJD + TDP + TRS - 215-220 seats.

New UPA : UPA + NCP + Left + JD(S) + Praja Rajyam - TC - 225-230 seats.

The others :

BSP(45), SP(17), ADMK (16), MDMK + PMK (7), JMM(3).

So the scenario now will resemble something like this :

The easiest solution to this would be for BSP to join hands with the Congress. Once this happens and inch extremely close to / just cross the magical 272 number, we can expect the lesser parties like PMK,MDMK,JMM to gravitate towards this alliance and lend it further stability.

Will Sonia tie up with BSP and risk BSP further eroding its core vote banks?

What will be extremely interesting is if UPA fall about 5 short of majority. Will they risk dropping the DMK for ADMK or will they try to not fail the no- confidence motion and run a minority government in order to ensure the Chanakya of Indian politics, Karunanidhi, is on their side. How much longer can they expect Karunanidhi to be in active politics given his health? This is turning out a better thriller than last year's IPL finals.

Will the Left agree to Manmohan as PM in this case? Or will Congress use this opportunity and present to us a new PM in Rahul Gandhi? I would suppose the Left wouldn't mind Manmohan Singh as much as they currently have us believe.

Given the extremely tight numbers, another scenario is for BJP to ally with the BSP and ADMK , thus taking it past 272. Here again , the smaller parties will migrate towards this alliance. However, BJP has bitter alliance experiences with the BSP and this might stand in the way , but will not be a path blocker.

To me, the final scenario pretty much depends on whom the President invites to come forward and form the government. This time more than ever, the President's choice will be critical and in case the post poll alliances aren't formed in reasonable time , then the coalition which the President invites will somehow cobble up a patchy alliance. Who will this be favorable to? We'll know in a week's time.

Two final, wild predictions before I close what's been a draining effort but an enlightening one at that.

Mayawati as Deputy PM. Next general elections in early 2011 : A three horse race between Modi , Rahul Gandhi and Mayawati.

I leave you with this 'pinch' dialogue : Gone are the days when people used to cast their votes. Nowadays they only 'caste' them.

My money is on XXX.. part III

2009-03-29T18:01:00.006+05:30

A little anecdote. Today , a friend of mine , who would come under well educated bracket (considering me and him have the same degree, he has to) suggested that he gets scared when he sees a devout Muslim start praying on the train he's traveling in. This totally shocked me , for ,nowhere in his life could he have possibly experienced something which had developed such a fear psychosis. To think that such a cliche exists even amongst the not scarred, supposedly middle class junta was scary. And this is what I had to say : "I'd rather lose my life trusting my fellow travelers rather than lose my sleep fearing them" . Any party which chooses to use this line shall have to pay royalty rights. And a certain young political greenhorn might have to pay slightly more as he has to pay for something else(yes, if found guilty and all those legal terms).

So today we look eastward. With a state known for its heavy political activism and a few states which are very rarely in the limelight, this is possibly the most intriguing of the four zones and perhaps personally, the most difficult to explore.

Orissa :

A brief introduction :

Home to the legend Biju Patnaik , and currenlty under the rule of his son, this state with its richness in natural resources and a great history is an example on how these factors alone need not contribute to the general welfare of the citizens in the state.

Issues :

Kandhamal:

The not so openly stated but the primary reason why the BJP - BJD alliance broke. (Apart from Naveen's national political ambitions i.e). Communal violence has often flared up in this part of the state , drawing accusations that the right wing organizations arer using this as some sort of a testing ground. Expect a heavily polarized set up to favor the BJP, at least in these parts.

BJP-BJD alliance break down :

A master stroke from Naveen Patnaik, who believed that his rather clean image would be sullied by further association with BJP. Also ensures that when the counting is done, BJD will have more seats to offer at the bargaining table. Also, even though BJP must be feeling like the bride whose fiancee ran off on the marriage day, this will not stop it from hoping that BJD will come back to it, if they have a good shot at forming the government.

Anti-incumbency :

Considering that Naveen Patnaik is in his second term as Cm , one might think that there will be a heavy vote against the goverment , but with his clean image and with his father's legacy still very much intact, Naveen Patnaik would be confident of a good show again.

My bet is on :

Expect a powerful performance from BJD , who are likley to emerge with an improved tally. Also , some of BJP's seats may now be gained by the Congress.

BJD- 14 seats

Congress - 4 seats

BJP = 3 seats

West Bengal

A brief introduction :

A communist bastion. Every elections, analysts predict a backlash from the public on the government and massive gains for the opposition. But somehow, it never materialzes and the Left manages to keep its fortress secure. A state with many complex issues this time around.

Singur, Nandigram and the like :

Sometimes even when a giant falls, its big enough to dwarf the little opponent. This could well be the case with relation to these issues. Though, the Left will face a backlash in these areas, the effect might not be widespread and the Left might not be affected adversely. Singur is a case where the public are as disenchanted with Trinamool as with the Left. So it might well be the case of known devil against the unknown one.

TC-Congress alliance :

Unlike last time, when there was no clear cut alliance between these two Left opponents, this time they seem to be in a mood to fight together. This will definitely give a boost to their respective tallies. How much of a boost, will be answered just a bit later.

Gorkhaland :

An issue whose handling by Buddhadeb left a lot to be desired at that point of time, will it might come back to haunt him this time? This issue again will not have a pan Bengal effect but in its localized nature, it might still hurt the left's tally.

My bet is on :

While the TC and Congress might better their performance from the previous time, Bengal might still be more comfortable riding on the Left side.

Left Front : 29-31 seats

TC : 4-5 seats

Congress : 8- 10 seats

Bihar + Jharkand :

JP Narayan would be tossing in his grave at the state of affairs in his home state. A propenent of social equality and in the eys of many, the leader of India's second freedom struggle, he will find most pitiable the state of affairs in Bihar which has turned into a caste politics laboratory , with very little development over the past few decades, due to reasons well known.

Key issues :

UPA break up:

Congress got extremely hurt at not even being considered a party worthy enought o be part of seat sharing talks and hastily pulled out of tyhe alliance announcing its plan to contest almost all the seats on its own. While the intent maybe right, in the sense that they wouldn't want to be totally sidelined in such a big state, but then the fact is that they have absolutely no ground support to be able to go it alone.

The SP-RJD+LJP troika :

Lalu's attempt to ensure that no major caste goes unrepresented in his alliance and also an strengthen his Muslim vote bank , through the Samajwadi Party. While the spin off may not be as positive as hoped for, it has done enough to convince the Congress that Lalu mighty be more demanding this time around , should the Congress be in desperate need to shore up their tally in Parliament.

Naxalism (Jharkhand):

Despirte the popularity of the Salwaa Judum movement, naxalism is still pretty widespread in this more prosperous sister state of Bihar. There have already been death threats and boycott calls issued by the naxals and how much this will affect the voter turn out would be a thing to watch. A lower turn out is likely to favor the JMM - Congress combine.

Key Players :

Nitish Kumar : He's been seen as some kind of a messiah in Bihar with his focus on development being in sharp contrast to what the people have been used to for quite a while. Swept to power quite convincingly in the assemble elections and will be hoping to carry forward the momentum into the Lok Sabha polls. He's been quite uneasy with the right wing image of the BJP, but is likely to stick on because moving away would been splitting of the anti RJD votes.

Lalu Prasad Yadav: The man who has quietly carried out the transformation of Railways into a massive profit making organization, (the means of doing so has been a reflection of his street smart thinking) and a star guest speaker at leading management institutes across the globe , he has a tough job at hand , considering that the ground situation has changed a lot since the last LS polls. Will do everything possible to ensure he stays an important player at the national level. His constant assurance that he's still part of the UPA might not be seen well at the Congress HQ but is a move aimed at comforting the voters that he's not an opportunist or a traitor.

My bet is on:

Bihar :

21 seats is too much for RJD to replicate and this could be one state where there will be massive gains for the NDA (not necessarily the BJP). Expect a wave of populism for the JD (U) , despite the recent expulsion of party stalwart George Fernandes. BJP could gain from the rubbing off of this goodwill on them.

JD(U) - 21-23 seats
BJP - 6-8 seats
RJD - 6-8 seats
LJP - 2-3 seats
Congress - 2-3 seats

Jharkhand :

With President's rule in place, a less vocal Shibhu Soren and BJP - JD (U) rifts emerging, this is possible becoming an increasingly complex state to predict. Still, a shift towards the BJP is the most likely outcome and Congress could lose quite a percentage of seats from this state.

BJP - 6-7 seats
Jharkhand Mukthi Morcha - 3-4 seats
Congress - 2-3 seats
RJD - 2-3 seats

Assam + the North eastern states :

A brief Introduction :

A region which is very rarely in the media spotlight, one of the more visually enchanting regions of India and contributes a disproportionate number of seats with respect to its size. Assam, could provide gains for the BJP.

Key issues :

Illegal Migration :

Migration from Bangladesh is one of the more emotional issues in this election with action being promised to stop this. However, one more accusation is that parties have generally tended to ignore this issue and used these people as vote banks instead.

Ultras :

Assam has been the site of heavy militancy for a long time now, and though the seriousness of the issue is possibly on par with that in J&K , not as much attention . media and otherwise, seems to be given to the issue. BJP would possibly be looking to leverage its strong anti-terror image to bag a few extra seats.

Rise of the BJP :

BJP has steadily risen in its popularity and the fact that it wil be playing the major partner in its alliance with the local party Asom Gona Parishad(AGP), though as part of a deal to concede the major party to AGP in the assembly elections, shows that it has become a serious contender in this region.

President's rule in Meghalaya :

The dismissal of the NCP led Meghalaya Progressive Alliance , could impact the Congress' image in the upcoming elections. Though the opposition will be its national partner , NCP, Congress would still be hurting should it lose it popularity and its seat here.

My bet is on :

Expect the BJP-AGP alliance to sweep Assam and the BJP to try and coinsolidate its position by adding a seat or two in the other states of the region. Congress will have to look somewhere else for making up its lost seats in this region.

Assam :

BJP - 6-8 seats

AGP - 3-5 seats

Congress - 2-3 seats

The others :

Congress - 2-3 seats

CPI (M) - 1-2 seats

BJP - 1-2 seats

Others (includes NCP) - 5-6 seats

The story so far :

It looks to developing into a three horse race, with the third front having done extremely well this time around. Point to note : if the BJD had been on NDA's side, they could well have shot into the lead. Advaniji, are you reading this?

My money is on XXX.. Part 2 ..

2009-03-21T20:34:00.006+05:30

Just a small thought before heading into the analysis and predictions. Why do almost all Indian parties have three word names : BJP,RJD,CPM,PDP,NCP,DMK and the list goes on. And even if by chance they have one short, they add one : JD (S) , JD (U). Strange.

Maharashtra ( + Goa):

A brief introduction :

Always a close fought state. Last time was a classic example, with the four leading parties almost perfectly splitting the 48 seats available. With the Shiv Sena having undergone a split since last time and with an aging leader, question marks are being raised about how battle ready the party is. Also home to the perennial PM hope, Sharad Pawar. Things are looking extremely interesting this time around.

Issues :

Terror attacks:

November 26th will carry a lot more significance in these elections than on the state polls held a few months back. Congress , which had secured a bounty in the Mumbai region last time will now have a tough time defending them .With the public sentiment also nt quite in favor of Sena in Mumbai, BJP might just get a minor bonus in this region.

Shiv Sena - NCP alliance :

This will be a sort of a political coup unlike any before, two powerful parties ,who haven't previously seen eye to eye, getting together. Oh sorry, we have seen that before, but well, that's what best describes this alliance. If it happens NCP will lose and Shiv Sena will gain .

Malegaon:

Communal tensions caused by the blasts are unlikely to subside. Considering that BJP has the sitting MP here, it will make for an interesting watch to see if they play the Hindutva card.

Farmer suicides:

For a long time the name Vidarbha , unfortunately, became synonymous with farmer suicides. Despite the big relief program for the farmers, its trickle down effect is yet to be felt. Will Congress/NCP dare raise the issue of having provided for relief at the risk of antagonizing the people of the region by daring to take even the slightest credit out of the whole issue. Interestingly, it is the BJP which holds quite a few seats in this area.

Key players:

Sharad Pawar, as mentioned earlier, will be licking his lips at the thought of a hung Parliament. He will play the key factors of experience, non-communalist past and his easy manner with the other top honchos to try and get the top post he so desperately craves for.

(No) Pramod Mahajan was BJP's go to man for almost everything, especially Maharashtra. He was the one man who could talk business with the Sena and do it hard. His top notch organizational and fund raising skills will be sorely missed by the party at an all India level.

Casino Scandal (Goa):

One of those variations of corruption issues which rock the country during the election time, this one involves allegations by the opposition (BJP) against the ruling coalition (Cong + NCP) over irregularities in allotting licenses for casinos in the state. Is getting rather high decibel levels of late.

My bet is on :

Expect the NCP to gain over last time and Congress to lose some, in effect not affecting the NCP + Congress total from last time. BJP will be desperate to make some gains , but the lack of a strong leadership in the state will continue to haunt them. The old tiger would want to ensure that his cubs will has some prey to feed on when he's done with the hunting in a short while and this could just about spur the Sena to do reasonable well.

Maharashtra

Congress - 7-8 seats

NCP - 13-14 seats

BJP - 11-12 seats

Shiv Sena - 13-14 seats

Goa

NCP - 1

BJP - 1

Gujarat :

A brief introduction :

Mahatma's home state, a former Congress safe state, now firmly in the BJP's hands. On our list so far, the first state which will see a direct BJP v Congress fight. Has seen a lot of strong regional leaders since the 90s from SS Vaghela to Keshubhai Patel but none of them can claim to have had the kind of hold on the state that Narendra Modi has.

Issues :

Development :

One of the very few states where development will actually be an issue. Modi will put in his report card for the last 7 years in front of the public and ask them to judge. Recent comments by top business leaders about Modi's administrative skills will have given him a mass image boost. Combined with his no- nonsense corruption free image, it makes Modi the man to beat this election.

Godhra:

More than 7 years on, the flame just refuses to die down. The opposition are ever willing to rake up this issue and election time means even more incentive to do so. The recent issue over declaring those missing officially dead has managed to bring the issue back into focus, just in time for the opposition.

Surat and Diamond industry :

This promises to be a substantial issue this election, with the opposition claiming that the worsening situation here and the increasing number of suicides are more representative of the actual situation in these parts.

My bet is on :

BJP should do strongly yet again, for , barring the Surat issue the rest of the state doesn't seem to have any issues with the present government , at least as far as those who vote are concerned. Gains for the BJP and losses for the Congress .

BJP - 17-19 seats

Congress - 7-8 seats

Rajasthan :

A brief introduction :

Land of the Rajputs, a key state for the fortunes of both the national parties as this is again a straight one on one between them. Has witnessed turbulent times due to caste issues in the recent past and is amongst the most caste dominated as far as choices in the candidate lists are concerned.

Issues :

IPL

Believe it or not, this is snowballing into a major issue in Jaipur, with the Congress government accusing Modi of taking the matches away from Jaipur as revenge for his loss in the Rajasthan Cricket Association elections. Of course, his perceived closeness to former CM Vasundara Raje will be exploited by the Congress in this issue.

Corruption :

The present government has been keen to try and tie up the previous Government to as many corruption charges as possible. With the present government barely a few months old, it will not be subject to much scrutiny on this count and this will have a tremendous negative impact on the BJP.

Lack of BJP leaders:

While Vasundara Raje was in power all seemed well in the BJP camp and they would have thought that they had set up a strong base in the state through her. However, since the end of her reign, BJP seems to be affected by lack of clear leadership in the state unit, while the Congress which usually suffers from this phenomenon has its house in order , thanks mainly to the fact that they are in power.

My bet is on:

Expect a complete reversal of fortune from last time, when BJP grabbed more than 80% of the seats. Congress will look to maximize their gains from here to compensate for other losses.

Congress - 20-22 seats

BJP- 3-4 seats

Madhya Pradesh + Chattisgarh :

The third straight BJP v Congress face to face on our list, this one seems to present a slightly better picture for the BJP than Rajasthan. Last time saw BJP do remarkably well reducing Congress to just six seats and helping itself to a massive 34. A good performance here will give the BJP's tally a much needed boost.

Issues :

SS Chauhan & Raman Singh

This will boil down to an almost Gujarat like situation where it will be the BJP's CMs versus the Congress party. Here again BJP will rely on a development agenda and Mr Clean image of its CMs. With Chauhan, and to a lesser extent Raman Singh, having ridden a massive wave of support to form the government just a few months back, BJP will look to keep the momentum going and win as many as possible.

Lack of leaders from Congress :

A state which was once home to Madhavrao Scindia , a Congress icon, MP has failed to produce any other leaders of his stature and this has cost it heavily in the recent past. Scindia's heir, Jyothiraditya's appeal is limited to regions around Gwalior. Kamal Nath , Commerce Minister, is not exactly a leader who will draw in the masses and the votes.

Return of the prodigal daughter :

Uma Bharti has indicated that she'll be supporting Advani for PM and the likelihood of her campaigning for BJP will be a mixed bag for the party, as there are chances
of power squabbles in the state if she returns to the fold.

One rupee / kg rice (Chattisgarh):

Raman Singh has through his two terms as the CM tried to project a pro poor image and his populist schemes for rice, wheat and other essential commodities are proving to be a huge hit and are likely to favor the party in these elections.

My bet is on :

BJP can look to extend their good show in the assembly elections , and though a 25-4 verdict may be too much to expect, MP will possibly one of the few states where the BJP will have a big percentage of seats from .

Madhya Pradesh :

BJP - 20-23 seats

Congress - 7-8 seats

Chattisgarh :

BJP - 8-9 seats

Congress- 3-4 seats

Though numerically BJP seems to have done well in round 2, compared to last time, it is likely to see a reduction in its numbers primarily due to its free fall in Rajasthan.

Congress , on the other hand looks like holding on to its tally in most of the states and gaining heavily in Rajasthan.

Just to sum up things so far :

So at the halfway stage, it looks like the Congress has managed to get more parts of its face forward.

My money is on XXX..

2009-03-15T14:11:00.004+05:30

where XXX = UPA/NDA/TTF (the third front). Any other naughty thoughts need to be banished right now.

Anyways, this is an attempt at doing something I have not done before, at least in written form : predict the outcome of an event , a mega event at that one. The risk of possible humiliation if I get things horribly wrong is overridden by the possible fame and fortune of getting it even 90% right. (Ya right!) With a month to go for the first phase, I have chosen to do a four part piece on the results of the upcoming general elections. Each part will focus on one among the four geographical divisions of India(NEWS). I shall start in the more comfortable home ground of the south.

With a total of 129 seats, this zone has a very big say in how the Parliament shapes up. However this zone has not been the home to too many Prime Ministers , primarily due to the strength of the regional parties.

Tamil Nadu

A brief introduction:

Shifted from being a Congress bastion in the early days after Independence to being a bipolar battle field between DMK(Dravida Munnetra Kazhagam) and ADMK(Anna DMK). Anti - incumbency at its second most violent. The UPA won all 39 seats on offer last time.

Key issues:
LTTE. Neither front though has done anything to claim an absolute advantage on this issue.

Lawyers v Police : Not as big an issue, but kind of underlines a law and order problem which the opposition can be expected to take advantage as elections come closer.

Unclear alliances : Though just over a month is left, no one is clear about who is on whose side. It looks increasingly like ADMK may be able to take away a couple of parties from the DMK's front.

Dark horse: No longer. DMDK (Desiya Murpokku Dravida Kazhagam) , actor turned politician Vijayakanth's political party has not done enough top stay in the public conscience or make any significant dents into the vote share of the other regional parties. An alliance with one of them is the best bet.

My bet is on: Expect a dead heat between DMK and ADMK, because the anti incumbency has not set in as much as the opposition would have wanted. But then ADMK will improve quite a lot from its tally of last time. (Not such a tough proposition considering they got zero, but still.)

DMK + Congress = 15-18 seats.

ADMK = 15-18 seats

PMK + MDMK + Left = 5-8 seats.

Andhra Pradesh :

A brief introduction:

Tough to standardise. The main areas are Coastal AP , Rayalseema, Telengana
and Hyderabad.Each one has a different issue. Yet another early Congress bastion, completely hijacked by NTR and has his son in law, Chandrababu Naidu trying to use his legacy to gain votes from the still loyal NTR fans.

Issues :

Telengana: A very highly volatile issue with promises flying thick and fast for the creation of the state. Basically has a pro telengana alliance building up between TDP and TRS. BJP has also thrown its hat into the ring promising a new state as soon as they come into power.

Satyam saga: Limited to the urban areas, expect allegations and counter allegations , till the election gets over at least. Is likely to be linked up with the issue of corruption.

Key players: YS Rajasekhar Reddy and Chandrababu Naidu. YSR is referred to ,at times ,as the Modi of AP for his authoritarian stands on many issues and this has resulted in erosion of support from AP congress leaders. Likely to ride the storm though. Naidu and TDP have been considerably weakened by desertions by some top leaders and there is widespread discontent in the party.

Dark horse: Unlike his Tamil Nadu counterpart, expect Mega star Chiranjeevi to have some influence on these elections. A fresh political force with massive grass roots support , an alternative to two parties the people are tired with, Praja Rajyam can expect to rock the boat a little.

My bet is on :

Congress can not hope to repeat their pretty big haul in 2004. But don't expect them to lose very heavily, thanks to fractures in the opposition. Yet another state from which BJP will have absolutely nothing to show.

Congress : 15-18 seats.

TDP : 13-16 seats .

TRS : 5-6 seats

Praja Rajyam : 3-4 seats

Karnataka

A brief introduction:

Has seen a lot of power shifts in the recent past. From Congress to JD(S) to the BJP every one will be hoping to get a share of the pie, in this state which is BJP's only contributor from the south. A state which has taken a communal tinge of late.

Issues:

Development :

While Yedyurappa has barely been in power for a few months, he has already established himself as a string leader. Has announced lot of plans for the state and is likely to go in with the development agenda.

Return of the Dreamer:

Considering the time spent by Deve Gowda sleeping on the stage, he must have dreamt a lot about returning as the PM some day. He has managed to get together some kind of an alliance to project his re-emergence as a national player. Do not expect the man to walk silently into the sun set.

Caste equations and communal issues:

There has been an upsurge in the caste talk in the political circles in Karnataka, and attempts being made by the opposition to get a sizable vote share even among the CM's Lingayat caste. With the recent events involving Sri Ram Sene and also previous allegations of anti minority behavior on the BJP in the Mangalore region, communal issues could play a part in these elections.

My bet is on:

Considering that only recently the people had given a big thumbs up for the BJP, one can expect a favorable public mood towards the BJP. However with a large number of seats from Karnataka,already in the pocket, the gains will be minimal if any. With the possible resurgence of the Gowdas, BJP will have to fight pretty hard if they want to increase their tally to 20.

BJP : 15-16 seats

JD (S) : 6-7 seats

Congress : 5-6 seats

Kerala:

A brief introduction:

Anti incumbency at its most violent. Known for extreme swings against the ruling party. The Congress especially have a not so fond memory of the mauling they got last time. Could prove decisive this time to both Congress' and the Left's hopes.

Issues:

Infighting in the CPI(M) :

Achuthanandan versus Pinarayi Vijayan has snowballed into a major controversy and with the top brass rooting for Vijayan, the CM is being seen as extremely distanced from his party.

Economic slowdown:

With a lot of Indian expatriates having been forced to return from the Gulf, the state is in a mini economic crisis, having not only lost a chunk of its income but also being forced to find employment for those returning.

Corruption:

An extension of the Achuthanandan- Vijayan fight, this government faces a crisis in public confidence. Those who believed in the rather strict communist discipline and looked at the CPI(M) as the less corrupt of the parties are now forced to do a rethink.

My bet is on:

An almost clean sweep by the Congress and therefore a considerable weakening of the Left Front's national clout.

Congress : 16-18 seats

Left Front : 3-4 seats

That concludes the first round of the big fight, and at the moment it looks like the Congress has its nose firmly ahead.

P.S : The above are personal observations and remarks, open to correction in case of factual errors and for debate in case of diverse opinions.

Stray Wonderings : Part III

2009-03-04T15:05:00.007+05:30

Wonder what Mrs. Singh had to say about this one. Seems like the stomach is not the only way to get to the man's heart.

While most human's can not possibly overcome the loss of one partner, here's someone who's gone through four times the anguish and still come out on top.

Subsidises what? Subsidises! What!?

This is what i'd term a 'classic' reference.

If only our economy was as resplendent as this home page of a leading daily wants us to believe.

Text only:

If I had the power to make one single law I'd use it to ban the reckless concatenation of "sation/zation (pronounced : say/zay shun)" to every imaginable word. Hearing Prannoy Roy saying "extremetisation" was the final straw. We have had enough of it I say, from globalization to talibanisation and TN Seshan to alsatian.

Our honorable home minister P Chidambaram to the even more honorable Barkha Dutt yesterday following the Lahore attacks , answering a query on Pakistan paying the price for covertly abetting terrorism : "we all know what happens when we ride the tiger". Yes Mr Home Minister, we most certainly know what happens when we ride THE tiger.

Ten questions for AR Rahman

2009-03-02T16:01:00.004+05:30

1) There is a story going around that you were thrown out of your school. If that is true, how could you keep your mouth shut through this ? (Kindly read YGP's comments)

2) Why o Why did you have to begin your oscar acceptance speech with that 'joke' which left the audience shell shocked ? (Instead you could have said "thank you for providing me the 'Keys' which will open the door to hollywood." Atleast I would have laughed at it.)

3) How could you let Silambarasan touch those little goldies and rob them of whatever little significance they have?

4) Why so much respect for an award which has as a nominee for best film, Rab Ne.. "I have won an Oscar but Filmfare is Asia’s biggest award function so I am here." , when you could have so easily said , "Boss, listen, such functions are an absolute mockery of film awards". (But then you could have so easily said the same at the Oscars, and didn't.)

5)Why did you not slap a defamation law suit against those bleddy Americans who called you a Rack Man and changed your name from A R Rahman to A J Rahman? ( Though by letting one's imagination run a little, A J can be expanded as Allah Jesus, thereby promoting the message of peace that you hold so dear)

6) What is your fascination with using so many layers in your music? (Almost like saying : Layers, No song can have just one.)

7) For an individual who's otherwise so modest, why so much love for your music that you often let it drown the lyrics in a song? (Have listened to New york nagaram some 30 times and am yet to figure out the lyrics)

8) When was the last time you gave us a memorable Tamizh album? (as a small side question, when will you next?)

9) What , according to you, makes you the great genius you are? (A R Rahman fans appeasement question)

10) Do you have any questions for us?

On the issue of Adaptation.

2009-02-16T13:52:00.003+05:30

A reliable source of debate is Indian cinema (of which Bollywood is often taken as a token representative, by mistake) versus Western cinema (Hollywood taking the role of Bollywood). This short piece takes a look at just one of the aspects which differentiates the two whilst not attempting to argue for which is better off. Adaptations.

If one takes a look back at the classics of Western cinema, one common thread running through them is that they are adapted from a book, which may or may not have succeeded on its own. And in the case that the author of the book is alive and kicking, then he/ she would most often that not be a part of the movie scripting team. This ensures that the basic premise of the book is not compromised and helps in capturing its spirit. The success of any movie depends on the strength of the script and also owes a large part to the conviction which the director and the cast have in the movie. This is where a movie adapted from a book scores , because the technical team of the movie and its cast have a solid idea of what their final outcome should resemble. And they take up such a project only if they believe in it.

Coming to Indian cinema, while such a system exists and has produced many a masterpiece, it is still not widely prevalent. It has been used most frequently by the established greats of Indian cinema , from Satyajit Ray to Adoor Goplakrishnan. One director who's an exception to this rule is Maniratnam. Though Thalapathi was a modern adaptation of a timeless classic, most of his other movies have seen him write his own script. This is possible though only due to his diligent research which again is dependent on books as the source.

A possible explanation is the strong oral tradition when it comes to passing on of stories. While India is very rich in its literature of the earlier civilizations, it is very common that even those stories are passed on from generation to generation through oral recitals. Another feature is the embellishment of the stories in songs, Villu paathu and Hari katha being two examples of its use in varied settings and cultures. This was evident in early Indian cinema where most of the movies were what Westerners would classify as musicals. A corruption of these ideals has what has led to the songs and item numbers which are used as stop gap and for entertainment rather than as a means to move the movie forward.

Having digressed a little, to bring back into focus the issue of adaptations, there are attempts being made in the Indian film industry of late to try and adapt novels into movies. However, the criterion seems to be more about the popularity of the novel rather than its adaptability. This curtails the creative freedom of the director because the popularity of the book would mean that the director has to try and stick to it almost verbatim. One wishes that in the future directors look at reworking popular and not so popular literature onto the celluloid. A happy marriage between the written word and moving images is critical for the success of both.

TN 03 FEB 2009

2009-02-13T13:28:00.004+05:30

Well Well Well! That's one well each for the three Tamil Nadu players picked for the NZ tour's test squad.

I do understand that the world is not what it used to be and that people have lost their money and minds , but this is incredulous. Hail stones in Chennai last year would possibly the closest on the bizarreness meter. Mr N Srinivasan and Mr Krishnamachari Srikkanth, with their piousness firmly stamped on their foreheads, have gone on to tread a path no man has dared to and ,with great respect for the future generations , never will.

8 players from Bombay was the norm a few decades back and 6 from Karnataka was a given in the 90s. Then came the bad boy of Indian cricket. Dada would take none of this regional bias nonsense. He insisted that he needed 11 players who best represented the country, not 3 players who best represented each selector in the panel. I might have my own favorites and prejudices,, he decreed, but you shall not have any. To his credit, he delivered. Period.

But then one constant through all the 76 years of Indian cricket was the shabby treatment meted out to players from a few particular states. It was as though at the first selection meeting there was an 'un'lucky draw and the names of these states were drawn. To name a few of these states: West Bengal, Kerala and Tamil Nadu. Having spent a considerable part of my ,still, early life in Chennai , I would take up Tamil Nadu to illustrate my point, and in order to not strain my memory too much I shall quote three names S Sharath, Diwakar Vasu and Reuben Paul of the top of my head.All these three may consider themselves pretty unlucky and the first one might be thinking he played in the wrong side of 2000 A.D.

While it is often stated that Sharath was plain unlucky to belong to an era coincinded with that of the Fab Four, it is a point worth wondering that another team mate of his, barely as talented as him got a break (that he failed to latch on it in the true spirit of most Tamil Nadu cricketers is another issue). It certainly would not have been asking for too much to name him at least as a back up batsman, but then he was repeatedly overlooked for players of lesser calibre. To his credit, he continued to pile up the runs and to the collective heartburn of cricket fans in the state he would repeatedly be overlooked.

At a time when decent fast bowlers were at a premium and left armers were an absolute rarity , unlike now, Diwakar Vasu presented a good option. That he would sometimes bowl left arm spin should have added to his chances. But then while many from across the nation were given a trial , he was not even in the fray. Add his reasonable batting skills into the mix and it becomes even more appalling why he never was given a break.

What Dhoni was to the Indian team when he made his debut, Reuben Paul was to Tamil Nadu during his career. An extremely aggressive batsman, he would set an innings ablaze with his six hitting skills and was a very reliable keeper. Considering that there was a stage when Indian keepers did anything but keep their places , he must have been a contender at some stage. But then the selection policy was so strange that while a good keeper who couldn't bat would be dropped for being an incompetent batsman ,another average keeper who could contribute a bit with the bat was given the boot for not keeping well enough. Considering that the Indian first class scene at that point wasn't quite spoilt with such riches , a fair trial to Reuben might have been the way to go.

The common thread running through the careers of these three talented cricketers was the blind eye that the national selectors displayed towards them.

Fast forward to the present. Three Tamil Nadu players in the same squad is something unheard of. My memory serves up times when there were two at the maximum, and those too in seasons when Tamil Nadu and its players had done very well in the Ranji season. That none of these three will feature in the first eleven is a fact, but then if ever there was an affirmative action policy in Indian cricket selection, this is it.

Naan Kadavul : Aghori um Aghoram um

2009-02-12T11:24:00.003+05:30

Those who had read this would have possibly been expecting this(not awaiting, expecting). So here goes.

What Hariharan Sriram was totally floored by: For a Bala movie the story, screenplay or the acting performances would possibly be the contenders for this, but then the winner ,hands down, are the stunt sequences. There may have only two proper fight sequences but they had an apt raw feel and the brutality of every hit sent a chill down the spine. Super Subburaya, super appu. The dialogues come a close second for being terse and meaningful. Not too many dialogues which do not create an impact. As a couple of characters say "Oru vasagam sonallum thiru vasagam sonna" and "avan romba paesa mattan , aana paesina vivaram aavum irukkum vivahaaram aavum irukkum".

What he was amazed by, but rather expectedly: Illayaraja's background score. The native feel that he's managed to bring in is something which only he can. Though slightly off key, strangely so, in a couple of places it was still the kind of music which enhances the movie. Not exactly Pithamagan levels, but infinitely better than his own magan.

What he was captivated by : In a dark movie, and this qualifies on both counts, the visuals need to be able to carry the impact and Arthur Wilson handles this more than competently. Watch out for some jaw dropping camera work in the final chase sequence and in the few moments before the interval.

What he felt let down by : The rather amateurish direction in the opening scene, giving it a soap opera feel. The poorly developed second rung of characters (barring Rudran's mother and Murugan). Although the lead pair have enhanced their acting reputations, one felt that their acting was repetitive and not as impactful as in Bala's earlier movies. The rather short screen time allocated towards the Aghori sadhus.

What he still can't get over : The acting and the screen presence of all the mentally and physically challenged people in the movie. Kudos to Bala for having utilized them as he has.

What he was pleasantly by : The humour quotient. From the scene in the police station to the one liners from Elee (a standout performance from amongst the physically challenged) Bala ensures that there are enough light moments between the emotionally heavy ones. The dialogues as earlier mentioned are a big help.

What he thinks are the standout performances : Pooja , for her acting and dialogue delivery in the last scene alone qualifies for this. The villain of the movie, (screen name Thandavan) seems to have gotten right into the skin of the character and will possibly be widely sought after in Kollywood after this. Credit to Bala for having yet again developed a very strong role for the villain. Arya can take the consolation price. :)

What he finds extremely funny : The U/A rating. Still unable to fathom which part of the movie the censor board found suitable for the U audience.

What his final verdict is : Having chosen to explore hitherto unexplored aspects , Bala manages to shock and awe and is now on his way to defining a stamp of his own, which no one can ever hope to replicate. A bit of a let down after Pithamagan though.

P.S : For every person you recommend this post to Google / Microsoft / Yahoo , which ever is not bankrupt by then will track you down and pay you $1000. And Ford will also give away itself for one lucky winner.

The porposal.

2009-01-27T14:43:00.003+05:30

Warning: Slightly more understandable for Tamizh audience. Translation/Transliteration though attempted may not convey the 'joke'.

No, the title is not a typo. Let me explain.

End December. Radio Mirchi(Chennai) was having one of its year end specials, where the caller will have to call up and narrate the most "mokkai" thing he had done that year (an event which everyone except you seems to want to remember and share).

Caller: Vannakam Sir(Salutations! Sir.)

RJ : Vannakam .. sollunga. (Return Salutations! Please go ahead and bore us to death with what you have to say.)

After some banter which is least important and therefore omitted. (I forgot that part.)

Caller: Sir, na panna mokkayaan vishayam ennana.. (an event which everyone except I seems to want to remember and share is .. )

RJ(doing a tremendous job of feigning interest) : Ah.. Sollunga. (Damn!! (to himself) Tell me.(to the caller))

Caller:
Na romba naala oru ponnu kooda chaat panninden sir. (For a long time, I was desperately trying to hook up with this female on the internet).

Anda ponnum oru naal vaanga beach la meet pannalamunu sollichu (That female also seemed to be desperate in equal measure and suggested we meet at the beach and take it 'forward')

Naanum romba espect panni ponen sir. (Like a hungry dog which rushes towards a bone with its tongue stuck out, I also agreed and went to the beach)

Anga poi paartha daan therinjudu, en life eh damage nu. (But after seeing her I realized the age old adage of The swelling is proportional to the size of the finger (like a flashback in a flashback, i shall translate the above back into tamil forming a rather confusing chain .. Viraluketha Veekam)) is totally true. So, my family, Total Damage)

Anda ponnum PORPOSE pannidichunga .. (That female being well versed in the life's teachings of answering the door as soon as opportunity knocks porposed, sorry , proposed, to me. )

RJ: Ennadu.. anda ponnu ungalukku PORPOSE panniducha?? (I really tried, but then just could not capture the essence of that statement in any translation. for (int i=0;i<(1/0);i++) {And no, the above is not a translation. ; })

P.S My inspiration for the above post is this. So any rude comments/ire may be directed there. Anything remotely positive maybe registered on the comments here. Thank you.

Slumdog Millionaire: A series of fortunate co-incidences

2009-01-14T04:23:00.003+05:30

Lets play this little game. And no, this doesn't win you 2 crore rupees,oops 20 million.

You are a citizen in one of those first world countries. Close your eyes and tell me what are the images that you visualize when I say India. Like in Who Wants to Be Millionaire I'll also give you options to make your job easier.

a) Taj Mahal
b) Beggars (specifically child beggars)
c) Muslim dons
d) Religious riots
e) Slums
f) More slums

If your answer is all of them and not much else, you are on Danny Boyle's side.

Now second question. Which amongst the following are thoroughly realistic?

a) Policemen and constables conducting interrogations in impeccable English.
b) Boys growing up in slums who go on to become thieves to make a living and in the process gain something more than just cash, a British accent.
c) A game show being shown live across news channels with what seems to be the entire nation hooked on.
d) The contestant being recognized by random people in the street. The contestant then having finished his round, sitting alone in one of Mumbai's most crowded railway stations a few hours later.

Now, if you think the answer is none of the above then move over to my side. And sorry, you do not have much company here.

For someone who has grown up watching Pakistani terrorists and Canadian doctors speaking tamizh , the above points shouldn't seem like major issues. But then I choose to apply the same yardstick and therefore ridicule the happenings on screen. Besides the afore mentioned movies did not go on to win Golden Globes.

Frankly, Slumdog Millionaire makes for a riveting drama. If I was born and brought up in the UK I would have lapped up every single frame of the movie. But being an Indian most of the movie seems to me like short selling of the true India to pander to the sensitivities of the western audience.

As stated earlier I hold nothing against the movie or its basic plot and the execution. An adaptation of Q and A by Vikas Swarup, the narrative which crisscrosses between the present and the past, is a delight and is captured beautifully on camera, starting from the initial "chase sequence" to the game show. Every single actor fits the bill perfectly, from the young Salim and Jamal to Shaurabh Shukla as Sergeant(?) Srinivas. The movie , though , belongs to Dev Patel and Anil Kapoor. Dev Patel wins your heart (besides the money, of course) with an understated performance. But, I would stick my neck out and say that it is Anil Kapoor who delivers the film's best with a calculated over the top performance. Freido Pinto looks simple and stunning. AR Rahman's background score for this movie cannot escape mention in any review and to state the well known and the widely accepted, it is simply stunning.

On the whole it is a good drama and any more significance to it will depend on which side of the Indian border you reside in.

Aham Brahmasmi

2009-01-05T23:51:00.004+05:30

This is possibly the significant preaching of Hinduism. This post though, does not deal with that aspect, as the author is grossly unqualified to comment on an issue of such deep philosophical significance.

This has to do with a certain movie called Naan Kadavul (a literal translation of the Sanskrit title). Not often does a movie let alone its trailer totally sweep you off your feet. Bala ,though, has proved in just 3 movies that with him you can only expect the unexpected. In 2 and a half minutes of sheer brilliance Bala has set the expectations from the movie soaring.

How many film makers would dare release a full length trailer with barely a dozen words spoken and all of them in a language foreign to the primary audience of the movie. How many film makers would showcase nothing other than a gory looking man hitting out at any one who comes in his way in an absolutely cold blooded manner for the most part of the trailer? No sign of the heroine, who going by the past movies of this director will not be the usual puppet like caricature as in most other movies. No time for a song sequence, as is the norm in any trailer of these parts. Its action from the word go, and for the next couple of minutes you are transported to a totally different world.

The stunning visual imagery cannot possibly be described in words. The camera has captured the gushing waters and the raging fires in a spectacular fashion. The music! Illayaraja! Be it the heightening of the tempo or the momentary silence , the grand maestro elevates the impact of the trailer every single second of its length.

In any Bala movie, the actors doesn't matter ,for, with a story as powerful as his, the actor playing the lead pales into insignificance and only the character remains with you and this time promises to be no different. Arya , who has given his everything for this movie for two years looks to have done a fantastic job. The other sadhu who seems to have been given quite a bit of prominence in this trailer is one of the many characters I am dying to see being etched out on the big screen, come Pongal.

In the rather unlikely event of the movie being a total disappointment, I'd still take this 2 and a half minute thrill a second trailer ride to 95% of the movies being released. To quote a very famous dialogue, "idhu verum trailer daan.. ! ".

Jaipur, Bhopal Delhi .. this is the headlines

2008-12-09T17:43:00.003+05:30

Note: The title is a slight rejig and english version of this song.

The so called semi-final is now over.

The recent election was influenced by wide ranging issues on both the national front and the local front. While in state elections, national issues seldom come to the fore, this time it seemed likely to be a totally different scenario because of the enormity of the national issues, terrorism and price rise. The local issues included pricing of rice(Chattisgarh) to Meenas(no, not the actress' fan club) vs Gujjars (Rajasthan) to deaths caused by Blue line buses(Delhi).

Democracy in India keeps challenging the so called obvious patterns and theories and this time was no different. The so far highly safe Anti-Incumbency factor thrown out of the window with three out of the five state's populace retaining their existing governments.

One another point which has been emphatically made is that however big the national issues might be, in a state election local issues gain a lot more predominance. Case in point are the results in Rajasthan and to quite an extent even Chattisgarh. In both the states experts did not give Congress much of a chance. While they went on to claim Rajasthan, they also put up quite a fight in Chattisgarh. If the national issues had been at the forefront then BJP would have done even better in MP and Chattisgarh.

Development and Mr.Clean images are becoming more and more prominent in the eyes of the public. There is a new crop of Chief Ministers coming up who are increasingly being seen as corruption free, a refreshing change from the times of the past when the point of debate was who was less corrupt. BJP has benefited heavily from the good image of its chief ministers (Modi, Raman Singh and SS Chauhan) and Congress has its own trump card in Sheila Dixit.

A trend which has not been possibly highlighted enough in the mainstream media is the rising clout of the BSP. It is starting to make its presence felt in almost all North Indian states. What is more significant about its victories in this set of elections is that four out of the five states (barring Mizoram) have been bipolar states since the emergence of the BJP in the late 80s. So, to be able to make the kind of inroads that it has indicates a growing clout and meticulous planning and execution. With a maverick leader who is a past master at social engineering, we can expect more of a role for BSP in the upcoming LS elections.

Extending on the above point, it'll be interesting to see how the BJP builds its relationship with BSP. With a bitter past, relations will certainly not be cordial. However, the BJP needs the BSP more than the BSP needs BJP, considering that BSP is capable of garnering 40 - 50 seats in the past stronghold of BJP, UP. What will possibly go against the BSP joining hands with BJP is BJP's anti-minority(primarily Muslim) image given that BSP in itself does not have a presence in those communities and Mayawati will be trying double hard to gain a footing there.

The biggest winner from this election is possibly Sheila Dixit. To make it a hat trick of wins in the national capital is no mean achievement and to do so given the general tide against the Congress at both state and national level is even more extraordinary. A margin of 43-23 is the icing and the cherry on top of the cake. But come general election, one may expect the BJP to sweep the seats in Delhi given the totally different issues on hand and that it will possibly be much better prepared by then.

Vasundara Raje would have probably realized that charisma and an urban centric image does not help winning elections. Her handling of key issues left a lot to be desired, especially the Gujjar agitation which also left her alienated from her core constituency, the Meenas.

As stated earlier both SS Chauhan and Raman Singh benefited from their clean images and the anti-incumbency at state level was stemmed a bit by the anti-incumbency at the national level barring which the scales might have tilted in favor of Congress, atleast in Chattisgarh.

Rajasthan and Delhi in particular. present the first setbacks to Arun Jaitley, BJP's golden boy when it comes to election management. Having seemingly perfected the art of micro-management of elections , he now has to sit back and analyze what went wrong. Even their previously successful strategy of maximizing the number of fresh tickets to avoid public backlash against non-performing sitting MLAs has failed them in Rajasthan.

Congress, on the other hand, will be forced to retrospect more on the lack of strong second rung leadership. The only state they managed a convincing victory, Delhi, was due to the charisma and the larger than life image of Sheila Dixit. While the Congress has already started trumpeting Rahul Gandhi as the next great Gandhi and the man with the midas touch, it has to hasten the process of finding strong regional leaders and resolve the issue of infighting which is costing it majorly. Sonia Gandhi will now have to start taking concrete measures on finalizing possible alliances for the LS elections because not many of its current partners would want to carry the 'risk' of being seen as the partner of this government, come election time.

Let the games begin!!

Terror struck.

2008-11-27T19:34:00.007+05:30

9/11.. 7/11.. 26/11 ..

The calendar is getting crowded with such dates of disaster.

Yet another terrorist attack. There is a certain numbness which seems to be setting in. No, not dumbness. That's more for the likes of Shivraj Patil.

The symbol of Indian pride. This was Jamshedji's message to the British,a century before Ganguly could say "f*** you* standing on the Lords Balcony. If ever there was any building which could carry the name of Taj without any dishonor to the original monument, it was this. The symbolism is tough to miss. A group of youngster with their tops already blown blowing off the top of this magnificent icon.

Foreign interest in this is apparently very high. Can we blame them? Not often are their citizens blown to smithereens. The 1000s of Indians dead before this count for nothing to them. The 10 of theirs here do. Kashmir is to them nothing but a blur on the map and the only interest for them is the colour to give it on the maps they publish it. Oh.. Did I forget the highly sought after Kashmir shawls?

The terrorists.

What next? 18 year olds wearing MegaDeath T-shirts?

Sickening.

In a couple of days there will be many many stories of courage, of heroic acts in the face of death. My salutations to all those who have staked their life and those who have laid down theirs in order to rescue the rest. May your souls rest in peace.

Image Courtesy: ibnlive.com

Why not to watch: Kaaranam Aayiram

2008-11-19T22:21:00.007+05:30

Not exactly. The title rhymes. Thats all.

Warning: Spoilers ahead. Proceed at your own peril.

(The second line refers more to the movie.)

But then it isn't exactly far from the truth, unless of course you watch this only for Surya and believe that Gautham Menon isn't too far from being the Tarantino of Kollywood as he wishes to be.

With its music(inspirational or inspired??) rocking the charts for long and the trailers and the banners promising a colorful movie it wasn't too difficult for the hype and the hope to build up.

As much as GVM has tried to create and emotional impact with his portrayal of the father son bonding in the movie, it fails to touch the right chords. At the end of the show you feel like having sat through two totally different movies in either half.

The movie opens with a series of short shots showing Krishnan(Surya, the dad) throwing up blood, being made to rest on the bed and then collapsing dead. It is strange that for a movie which is otherwise so painfully slow, these shots of pain and suffering are in this slick editing mode.

Soon the news is conveyed to Suriya(Surya,the son) who is an army commander on board a helicopter on a rescue operation.

Unintentional comedy one: Suriya's fellow armymen then offer their condolences which sound more like apologizing for stepping on someone else's toe.

Then with cries of "Daady daady" in the background, Suriya goes into flashback mode and in a narration in narration mode, Simran is shown recounting the past to Suriya, sometime before he left on this mission of his. Ah Simran! With her each moment on screen, she makes us rue all these years which have been lost without her gracing the silver screen. She delivers the movie's second best performance (after Surya of course)and with so much ease. Welcome back Sims!

After a few more scenes enters Meghna (Sameera Reddy), Gautham Menon's latest m(o)use. What a babe! . Her histrionic range in this movie is amazing. She has managed six distinct expressions.

1) Eyes open and mouth closed.
2) Eyes open and mouth half open.
3) Eyes open and gaping.
4 - 6 ) Repeat above with eyebrows raised.

And just when a scene arrived where her emoting was a little bit more demanding , Menon managed to get Surya between her and the camera.

Unintentional Comedy 2: In her intro scene, after a long conversation in local(chennai types) tamizh, suddenly Reddy comes up with this line "Nee SESHTA panna maatiye" !! All the ambi mamas would have died a second death in their graves.

Unintentional Comedy 3: She belongs to REC Trichy. Having studied there for 4 years, I can do Mother Promise and God promise that I had not seen any one even remotely as hot as her. And then to think this was 10 years back? That she ends up in Berkeley from here is altogether a different issue. Wonder how much money my college paid to Gautham Menon. All our fees just went down the drain.

What follows is a Suryavamsam like sequence where in about two minutes Surya goes from an absolute wastrel to a succesful businessman. And then with the blessings of his father, he flies to the US to pursue.. the heroine. Whatay father, whatay son!

Unintentional comedy 4: When asked to explain how he expected to be granted a visa given his financial status etc etc , Surya gives a speech on how he is going there to pursue his love and love only.And lo and behold he is granted the visa. A five year multiple entry one at that.

After the customary heroine death, Surya turns alcoholic and drug addict. However, with the help of his "daddy" he manages to get himself off drugs and goes off to Srinagar to reclaim his old self and then to Delhi. And then follows a needlessly long sequence of him rescuing a child from a clutch of gangsters (Prithviraj on comeback trail?). Then he joins the army and passes out with his new found love Divya(a neat and dignified performance) in tow. He is then called for an emergency rescue op and is forced to leave home in a hurried fashion. The extended rescue sequence after he gets the news of his father's death seems totally unwarranted and could well have been conveyed by the voice over.

Harris Jeyraj tries some innovative sounds in the background from time to time. Though the songs are awesome, the picturization doesn't do full justice to them. Mundinam Paarthene belonging to the 60/70s and Yethi yethi to the early 90s seem to be total misfits. With both the heroines boasting of family packs, it is down to Surya to flaunt his six packs in appearing from a waterfall for the Annul Maelae song.

Despite all these negatives there are quite a few positives in the movie(Anti-Murphy's law). Surya's performance is top notch in a role tailor and ready made for him. The change in his body language as he grows up, the pain caused by Sameera Reddy's death and his struggle to get himself off the drugs are well etched and perfectly enacted. The make up for the dad Surya is also pretty neat in most scenes. The scene in the hospital when Meghna's dad comes to collect her body is one of the very few instances when your heart actually goes out to the characters on the screen, as is the scene when dad mistakenly discovers his son's drug addiction.

Though an honest attempt by Gautham Menon,it is clear that he is more adept and comfortable handling action films, as can be seen by the style in which the second half is taken in comparison to the first half.

But despite the fact that this is supposed to be a tribute to all the fathers of the world, you might not want to risk compelling your dad to come along to watch the movie. If you still want to do so, then,to quote Russel Peters, "Somebody's gonna get hurt real bad".

Stray Wonderings Part II

2008-11-08T22:52:00.008+05:30

The following pictures(print screen + paste into paint + add image into blogger) are self explanatory. In other words, I am out of stuff to say and have resolved to such cheap tactics to keep my blog going. Of course, I can claim that this blog has links to videos of actress in bathroom fitting showrooms. But then it is one of the oldest tricks in the blog world and therefore should have been avoided.

So here goes.

The following picture might not make sense to non-tamizh readers. What has been highlighted reads "En kanaku" which is a transliteration of My Accounts. Nothing wrong with that but usually in Tamizh(the chennai variety), kanakku refers to business, the murder kind. "Kananka theekardu" which should mean ""closing the accounts" means to "to finish a person off".

And ya, Gaptun is back. Bigger (!), better and looking smarter than ever.

[Image Courtesy Indiaglitz ]

I leave you with a quote from MS Dhoni. "Reverse swing is crucial when the new ball does not do much for the fast bowlers to come back and make an impact in the game. It has been important right through the series. We have maintained the ball well and have done it (reversing) consistently. In Delhi it did not happen much because there was some grass on the wicket and in the outfield".

Farewell Jumbo!

2008-11-02T16:03:00.008+05:30

As he has done quite often in his career Kumble brought alive a boring final day in a Test match at Kotla today. However unlike in the past, this did not cause discomfort and nervousness amongst the opposition batsmen. Many are the batsmen who have been at the receiving end of Jumbo's super fast flippers and spitting leg breaks and though his form had dipped quite a bit of late there will be lots of them who will be more than relieved to hear that the warrior had hung up his sword.

Many are the special memories that he leaves us to cherish. The first of those came in the Hero Cup final when he picked up 6 for 12 against the Windies when a couple of wickets came thanks to yorkers which until then, even the Indian pacers couldn't bowl accurately. It was yet again against the Windies that he would produce a sight never before seen and possibly never again seen as he bounded in with his broken jaw to try and secure a wicket for India. His performance against Australia down under was perhaps something which he enjoyed quite a bit himself. His celebration after taking out Ponting in Melbourne after he had worked him out is one of those rare occasions when he's let his emotions be so visible in the cricket field. Ans so were his reactions after getting to his maiden century at the Oval.

But perhaps the moments which defined all that Kumble stood for, came during the course of that much discussed Sydney Test this year. Even as the rest of the Indian batsmen got out or gave their wickets away, he stood there at one end determined to fight it out till the end. With his limited technique he defied the Aussies, focused on playing out every ball and taking India closer to safety. However as fate would have it, with just five minutes to go three wickets fell in one over leading to the defeat. How much it would have hurt the man is for anybody to guess. And then with the whole Indian and Australian press waiting for his sound bytes after the most controversial Test of our times, he kept his cool and came up with one single statement which said more than a five minute speech would have.

Determination, commitment, composure and dignity are words which cannot be strung together to define any other sportsman better than him. Not many Indian cricketers have left the game on their own terms, but then the timing of Kumble's departure has been on the spot, much like his deliveries. Never once has he given less than 100% on the field and the moment he's recognized that there were factors beyond his control which would not allow him to do so, he's stepped down. Memory doesn't serve up any names of Indians who have retired as captains and he definitely deserves to have done so.

There are two kinds of great players. There are those whose very presence lights up the arena and then there are those whose absence speaks more about their contributions. India have been lucky enough to have one of each kind play in the same era. The large number of matches that he has won for India and the sheer volume of wickets that he has taken are but just statistical reminders of his contribution to Indian cricket. Season after season Kumble has spearheaded the Indian attack, at times plugging away on unresponsive tracks and mostly leading them to victory with spells which are lessons for generations of bowlers to follow . As Dravid, Laxman and the rest of the team members took Kumble on a final lap of honor around his favourite piece of turf, it is only natural that their shoulders would have sunk in under the weight of this giant, who never let his own drop, at any point of time.Goodbye Jumbo, and thanks for all the wickets.

Landmark achieved but..

2008-10-18T09:13:00.003+05:30

As Sachin guided the first ball after tea to third man yesterday to go past Lara's record it bought immense relief and pleasure to all cricket fans. But then there was also a tinge of disappointment in the timing and the environment in which he passed the landmark.

He got those runs against a bowler whose only possible future claim to fame would be the same. And by the way just for remembrance, his name is Peter Siddle.

He got those runs in a half empty stadium, and half of this half was filled with school children allowed free entry. This was not in a foreign nation but in our own land. I am sure people in any other country would have paid thousands to watch this moment.

He got those runs just two innings and a week after I had last seen him bat live on the cricket field. Yes, I would also have paid thousands to watch this moment. (For those who know me, this can be classified under Ripley's believe it or not)

And finally and perhaps most tragically the man on air at that time was Ravi Shastri.

Compare this with the manner in which Lara eclipsed Border's record. At Adelaide, in Border's own land. Against Glenn McGrath, perhaps the best fast bowler of our times. On air were some of the legends of Channel Nine. And the shot. With all the nonchalance in the world he walked across the stumps exposing each one of them and tucked away McGrath to fine leg.

But then Sachin never does bother about landmarks or the way they are achieved right? Yeah right!!

Stray Wonderings

2008-10-03T12:53:00.004+05:30

If women like these have to resort to matrimonial sites to find their life partner(s) (though the s seems to make it grammatically correct, something about it doesn't seem right), what on earth is wrong with the Indian men??

I have always wondered what this headline meant. " Man accused of raping and brutally murdering 10 year old gets Life"

There was an ad for a a Times Interior decor exhibition whose tag line ran something like " To view the complete Interior". Naughty.

And top of the pile. An ad from VLCC. It claims to provide an offer. "Join the 20 kg weight loss program now and lose 10 kgs extra for free". Thats what i call an offer which can not be refused.

Sorgame Endralum.. (Even the heavens... )

2008-09-28T01:49:00.006+05:30

This is an attempt at adapting the evergreen song Sorgamae Endralum to the modern times. Before I commit that blasphemy, I would like to seek some retribution by first presenting the original lyrics. I would also like to apologize to the non - tamilian readers(I know.. I wish.. ) for the content which is possibly as alien to them as common sense is to George Bush.

M: Sorgame endralum adhu nammora pola varuma
Ennadu endralum adhu nam nattukku eedaguma
pala desam muzhudum pesum mozhigal tamizh pol inithiduma

Charanam 1

F: yerikarai kaathum yelelelo pattum inge edhum ketkavillaye

M: paadum kuyil satham aadum mayil nitham pakka oru solaillaye

F: vethalaya madichi maaman adha kadichi thuppa oru vazhi-illeye

M: odi vandhu gudichu mungi mungi kulichu aada oru odayillaye

F: ivvoru enna ooru nammoru romba melu

M: ada odum pala kaaru veen adambaram paaru

F: oru dhaagam theera yeedu moru

Sorgame endralum....

Charanam 2

M: maadu kannu meikka meyaradha paarka mandhaveli ingu illiye

F: aadu puli aattam pottu vilayada arasa maram medailliye

M: kaala reundu pooti katta vandi ooti gaanam pada vazhi-illiye

F: thozhigalai azhachi solli solli rasichu aatam poda mudiyaliye

M: oru yandhiratha pola ada inge ulla vaazhkai

F: idhe enge poyi solla manam ishta pada villa

M: nammoora pola oorum illa

Now comes the updated , and therefore downgraded, version.

M: Sorgame endralum adhu nammora pola varuma
Ennadu endralum adhu nam nattukku eedaguma
pala desam muzhudum pesum mozhigal tamizh pol inithiduma

Charanam 1

F:elliots beach kaathum deva gaana paatum inge edhum ketkalliye..

M:metti oli satham alaigal modum nitham paaka oru channel illaye

F:vethalaya madichi nalla adha kadhichi thuppa oru chuvaru illaye..

M:odum vandhiya idhichu mama adha pidichu escape aaga vazhi illaye..

F:ivvooru enna ooru nammooru rambha melu..

M:ada odum pala bar u, veen adambaram paaru..

F:oru daagham theerka edhuku beer u..

Sorgame endralum....

Charanam 2

M: maadu kannu meika mayor adha paarka mandhaveli ingu illaye

F: chinna thambi gaptun theerpa eduthu solla arasa maram medaillaye..

M: thanni konjam aethi katta rendu oatti vaazhum vaazhka puriyalaye

F: vaadhiyaara kalaichhu solli solli sirichu aatam poda palli illaye

M: oru thanthiratha pola ada inge ulla vaazhka

F: inge dhinam poi solla manam ishta pada villa

M: nammoora pola oorum illa

Marriage.java

2008-09-24T00:37:00.005+05:30

Futurisk Trading Limited

2008-09-05T22:25:00.005+05:30

Futurisk Trading Limited ,as a part of the name suggests, will deal with Futures Trading and as the other part reveals, will be a high risk venture. What is so significant about that, some may ask, as all futures trading is high risk. What makes this more riskier than even oil trading is that this deals with MPs of our country. (For some strange reason, deals and our MPs can never be too far away,even in a simple sentence.)

This idea stuck me after watching the stocks ("rates") of our MPs move to never before seen high of 25 crores before plummeting down to a stupefying low of 3 crores. What if there was an institution to take advantage of this? Just imagine how, if by chance, a company had seen this coming and off loaded its MPs just in time. 22 crores in a matter of a few hours is amazing money to make.

What makes this such an intriguing business is that unlike other futures trading commodities, there is no proper information stream to base your decisions on. In fact you'd have to look at at least three or four different sources to get the complete picture. And the fascinating aspect is that each MP is a totally different entity. It is not like the Brent North Sea crude and the light sweet crude, which are mere divisions and are driven by the same forces. For instance while one MP would be satisfied with a couple of crores as pocket money, others might insist on a cabinet berth and one or two might have the audacity and power to insist on a CM berth. Of course, since it becomes difficult to quantify such aspirations the company will only strictly deal with those MPs who settle for cash.

While discussing this idea with a couple of people, I got a rather cold response. My brother in fact totally dismissed it by saying this is nothing new and that there is major betting going on anyways in related matters. I figured that in that precise point lies the beauty of my plan. Why not streamline all this trading and make it official so that more people can participate in it. It will give us all a chance to make money from our MPs . Isn't it time that we got at least something from electing these people to power.

So next time you have a convict elected to the Parliament do not sulk and despair at the direction in which our democracy is heading. Instead, be sure that when the time comes for some voting in the Parliament, these are the very people who would figure prominently in the futures trading circuit. And if you want to know whom to put your money on keep watching this space.

Rock On!! Feel good sounds good.

2008-09-03T18:23:00.005+05:30

If you live in a city on the shore, you'll understand the significance of some time on the beach. It allows you to breathe in some much needed fresh air and gives you time to stare at the sea reminiscing about the past. How many ever times you go to the beach, even though you may have the same surroundings and know what to expect it is still a refreshing experience each time. Rock On is a movie which provides for such an experience.

Rock On!! is the story of the ups and downs of the music band band Magik and the people associated with it. Very well written and almost perfectly executed by Abishek Kapoor, through its four lead characters Joe(Arjun Rampal), Rob(Luke Kenny), KD(Purab Kohli ) and Adi(Farhan Akhtar) he showcases four different paths that people take when their college dreams are shattered. Rob: Though he broods about how life could have been, ,he ends up working in a field which is connected to music and derives some satisfaction from that. Joe: A man who refuses to compromise on his first love and despite growing economic difficulties doesn't want a job which demeans what he loves. A glowing example of the everyday man, Adi as the individual who compromises in order to lead a materialistically comfortable life, while attempting to shut out the past from his life. And KD is shown to be the light hearted fellow, whose attempt at normal life includes messing up orders in his family business and trying to have a blast whenever he can.

Apart from these four "leads" there are a couple of other characters, the wives of two of the men involved, who get a lot of screen time and importance, something which does not usually happen. Debbie(Shahana Goswami) as Joe's wife plays the wife who's worried nuts about their son and the growing economic problems and pesters Joe to find a well paying job, even if it means under utilizing his talent and hurting his musician ego. She also hides within herself the agony and the pain in the manner in which Magik was disbanded and Joe was treated in that particular phase. A very tricky character to be played and one which if played improperly would have made her irritating. However, she carries off the role in a manner in which Debbie evokes more sympathy than irritation. Hats off to her for the wonderful performance. Sakshi(Prachi Desai) is possibly burdened with the most one dimensional character of the movie and is forced to play a sweety sweety wife who wants her husband to enjoy life and be emotionally more contented. A reasonably easier part to play and creditably played without any flaws.

Being a mini musical, it is only obvious that music becomes a character in the movie and Shankar, Ehsan and Loy certainly make it a part to remember with mostly cheerful and at times soulful tunes. They have carried a heavy burden and have succeeded with elan.

Full of little moments and deft touches, the movie which can be considered a little slow by commercial standards, manages to hold on to the viewer's attention through out. Wonderfully underplayed performances by Arjun Rampal and Luke Kenny play perfect foil to the more complex character of Farhan Akhtar and the witty Purab Kohli. All four of these actors have given their characters a dignity and a life like feel to it and this is possibly the biggest success of the movie. A special word of mention to Farhan Akhtar, who has proved he's as good in front of the camera as he's behind it. He plays two totally different characters in the movie, one who gives a soul to his songs and the other who lives his life without one, and he lends much credibility to both the roles.

The stand out feature of the movie is its dialogues,very natural and meaning more than what is said. The lines of each of the actors are written in step with the kind of characterization and nowhere do you find any character mouthing lines which seem to be forced.

Though saddled with a few commercial compulsions which prevent it from being a full fledged music movie, Rock On still succeeds in making the viewer move and feel with the characters and ensures that this lingers on after the viewer has left the cinema hall.

Water water everywhere..

2008-08-19T20:51:00.005+05:30

What do people do when the rains are so bad that their car parks get flooded? This. Or atleast this is what I saw some one doing.

Additional information: The road in question is already full of slush and the part of the road where this water was "released" was perhaps the only walkable stretch.

Note: This is the author's first attempt at doing anything (useful) on image editors and he therefore seeks refuge from disparaging, and therefore discouraging comments on the image part of the blog.

End of an ad age.

2008-08-12T15:44:00.008+05:30

Disclaimer: The characters who form a part of the following blog are entirely non-fictional, though the events associated with them are not. The author claims protection against any possible defamation suits by claiming that all this is in good humor (hopefully).

Boost has decided that it would pull out of its deal with Sachin Tendulkar because the costs involved were getting unmanageable for them. No, Sachin did not hike his fee. (those days are either in the pre-Mendis era or when Kalki decides to pay, possibly one of the longest anticipated visits, to our part of the universe) The reason as an "inside, highly placed, credible source who does not wish to be named" put it was because of the spiralling costs in their Countdown to 11954 campaign.

In all its eagerness to be associated with the record breaking event, Boost had at the start of the Sri Lanka series decided that on some of the tv channels there will be a sort of a counter which would display the number of runs that the Little Master had to get to cross Lara's milestone. Little did they know they'd have to run the campaign for a couple of months rather than the couple of innings they had hoped for. The source (the same one as above, so i'll spare the adjectives) also suggested that, if only Tendulkar had let them know his intent of breaking the record at home against the best team in the world they would have waited before launching the campaign.

Saurav Ganguly meanwhile has approached Pepsi and asked them to include him back in their list of brand ambassadors. In fact he's offered to do it for free but has made just one request in return. He wants to shoot an ad similar to the "sympity" raising one a couple of years back, where the king of come backs is shown almost fighting back tears as he pleads the nation and the selectors to give him one more chance. Pepsi have reluctantly agreed.

This time however, plans are on to shoot the ad at the old home of cricket where Dada will be seen practicing his off side magical shots on one side of the screen and similar strokes from his still awe inspiring debut century are shown on the other. This is being described as an attempt to remind the selectors,and more importantly himself of what he is/was(choice left to reader depending on whether he/she is Bengali or not) capable of. One factor which they seem to have not taken note of is that Star Cricket has already shown that innings N-1 times where N is k/0. So the moment an image from the match comes up they will switch channels at speeds = k*speed of light (k > 0).

In the meanwhile,Kissan have stated that they are not very happy with the way Dravid has associated himself with their brand of late. They say that Dravid seems to be projecting an image of being stuck in a jam, the traffic variety. On the one hand, run traffic has stopped and on the other the pedestrian signal seems to be always green,explaining why he's almost always walking to and from the pavilion.

However, all is not lost for The Wall. Gillete have expressed a keen interest in extending their contract with him. A senior management official was quoted as saying "We have always prided ourselves on being able to provide clean and close shaves. One just has to watch the replays of his recent knocks and the number of close shaves that he has had will be very much evident. And ya, there are no cuts at all. It matters little though that instead of a clean shave, he's geting himself clean bowled more often these days."

After all, there seems light at the end of the tunnel, the one in which Indian batting stars seem to have gotten derailed right in the middle of.

Sensation and Insensitivity

2008-08-04T20:13:00.006+05:30

July 2004 : Fire rages in a Kumbakonam School and 100 odd children are, for the sake of avoiding a more gruesome word, burnt to death.

Cut to August 2008: A fake alarm of a landslide triggers, at a temple in Himachal Pradesh, a slide of humans instead and in the ensuing stampede 140 people are crushed to death.

Apart from being tragedies which evoked both anger at the administration and sympathy in a large scale for the victims, these two and many more such tragedies share another common thread. Highly insensitive reporting by the media all in the effort to sensationalize these events. The photographs in the leading dailies of our nation in addition to presenting a sad story also cut a sorry picture. For instance, The Hindu, a supposedly more conservative paper , had a dozen or so pictures of charred remains of the victims, totally distraught kin and more pictures of charred bodies splashed all across their back page . The recent stampede ensured Times of India had something other than scantily clad women to feature on their front page. What about a photo showing dozens of dead bodies instead?? Who cares as long it creates an impact.

The electronic media (television primarily) aren't exactly finger licking kids either in this respect. The most disturbing visuals were aired recently after the Kabul bombings. It showed the son of the slain individual performing the last rites of his father. How more insensitive can the media get? I am not risking my stakes at any level because just as you think reporting has reached a nadir they dig down even further. If only they dug so deep for oil across the world, we wouldn't be bothered about rising fuel prices atleast. In the recent past we have seen so many instances when the kith and kin of victims of crime are made to come on camera and then made to answer questions which only intensify the pain and sufering they undergo. Would it be asking for too much to ask the media to avoid such sound bytes?

Even a couple of days back, in one of the news channels coverage of killings in an ashram they had a parent of one of the kids sent there wailing on camera for the whole nation to see. It is one thing if someone suddenly starts weeping uncontrollably when on air and totally another when the camera is not taken off the faces of these individuals but instead, kept on them long enough, that it gets highly revolting. This is not a one off incident but something which has been happening with unfailing regularity on our news circuits. The editors and correspondents who are behind such coverage would have a great alternate career as script writers for the K series of soaps. They realize the impact that tears have in living rooms across the country.

It wouldn't be a crime to say that the beheading videos that various terrorist organizations upload on their websites are better than the kind of news items the media carries. After all when you enter the site you are aware of what you will be viewing. Imagine a 15 year old who is an avid sports page fan of The Hindu, eager to get his fill of the happenings in the world of sports first thing in the morning, turning to the last page and finding photographs of burnt bodies instead. What is the impact that it will have on these impressionable young minds. Or lets consider even a 65 year old who's seen everything in life looking at those pictures. He is not likely to be too visually impressed either. What is the point of using such photographs? Everyone knows that a tragedy has happened but not everyone would like to chew their morning breakfast looking at these photographs.

What is even more saddening is that in a decade when two of the most event defining pictures have been published in our national dailies such disturbing photographs and videos are starting to form a staple ingredient. Lets take for example the now timeless picture of that Ahmedabad tailor, terror and fear evident in every sinew of his face, pleading to be left alone, during the Gujarat riots a few years back. The photograph did not contain any images of weapons, dead bodies or blood. It told a story. In fact it did much more than that. It created an impact. It was worth a thousand editorials. The other photograph in focus is the award winning picture taken in the aftermath of the Tsunami which took more than one lakh victims. It wasn't a picture of strewn bodies. It contained just one woman who was dealing with the loss of her loved ones. It does contradict what I said about grieving images being disturbing. But this one was different. It had a certain raw appeal about it. Like the Gujarat riot picture, it put the whole Tsunami in perpective with just a single picture. The loss that the victims kin feel, the loneliness and the despair, everything was so effectively conveyed in just this one click of the camera.

When such amazing works are possible in the most disturbing situations and in tragedies of such magnitude, why can't the media work towards bringing a more cultured rather than sensational approach to stories of human suffering? Are TRPs and number of copies sold the only measure of success for a media organization? In the information era when the power of the media is ever increasing, it should try to break information barriers than be mere breaking news tools, and more importantly try to be more sensitive than sensational.

Hair raising issues

2008-07-28T13:49:00.007+05:30

A sachet of Head and Shoulders which I purchased a couple of weeks back threw me a pleasant surprise.On the cover was written the brand name in three local Indian languages, Hindi, Tamizh and another language which I couldn't quite decipher. Of course being a Tamilian it gave me some sense of satisfaction that fellow citizens of my state were such an important customer base for a hygiene related product. Maybe the next time I sit in a local bus, I don't have to worry about how many sweaty heads before me polluted the seat with the latest lice varieties.

However this smug satisfaction was to be short lived, and instead a totally different line of thought set in when I bought the same company's shampoo bottle instead. The first thing I did after I set my eyes on the bottle was of course to check whether the bottle also had writing in the Indian languages. On the contrary , this one had used just one language, English. Did this mean that the shampoo bottle and the shampoo sachet are intended for a totally different customer base? Was it possible that the shampoo bottles were more used by the middle and upper middle classes who were expected to know English, while the sachets were primarily used by people from the lower strata of the economy. If so, it presents a rather interesting insight into the spending patterns of our society.

As we go up the income classes we find that people prefer to spend more in bulk, while in the lower levels people would prefer to buy short term even though if they were to buy the bottle they would only benefit in the long run. Is it got to do with something as complex as the mind set that your growing up environment develops in you, or does it come down to something more basic as the amount of cash people have in hand at any given point of time. Also, given that there is a section of people who buy only sachets and not bottles, do they buy them often and therefore at the end of the day their frequency of washing their hair is comparable with those who buy bottles. If that were to be the case, the country's upper classes would have to give up their self righteous claims of being more hygiene conscious just because of their placing in the society.

However one thing which puzzles me is that why would the company not use the local languages even on their bottles. For one I am sure that doing so will help them to connect better with their Indian customers, however few they might be in comparison to the sachet users. For if there is one thing that companies have learnt over a long period of time in history, it is that the more you appeal to the local populace, the more your chances of success.

Awe and Shock

2008-06-23T21:04:00.005+05:30

The recent Airtel advertisement shows Madhavan and Vidya Balan sauntering along in a train happily playing cards when a reminder comes on Madhavan's mobile about a bill payment. And before you know it, the bill's been paid, at the touch of the button. Awesome. And then they show the train moving out of a tunnel in some remote place. Scary!

So far at least if you did not pay certain bills, a few well paid body builders would come marching to your home and employing barely pacifist means, ensure that you shell out the money immediately. If you thought that the best way to escape was a nice relaxing holiday in the hills while you try and arrange money to take care of these bills, think again. The mobile phone is not only a device you can use in an emergency, it could just be the very tool which can send you into one of those emergency wards at a shady hospital in the hills. The lesson for all of us is to switch off our mobiles and switch it on only after you have paid all your bills, and not try some stunt of paying those same bills from your mobile phones. After all, wherever you go, your bills follow!

Dasavatharam: Kamal all the way

2008-06-20T12:37:00.007+05:30

Warning: Review contains spoilers, almost all of them. It may be excruciatingly long, like the movie as some would claim.

Releasing on the same weekend as the biggest disappointment of 2007, Sivaji, comes the magnum opus of this year, Dasavatharam. Having heard mixed reactions to the movie ranging from really good to pathetic helped lower my expectations and whether this is a good thing or bad thing I'd not know for it might have jaundiced my view into looking for the positives more than the negatives.

For starters, I wonder aloud the authenticity and the logic behind the claim that the film has no story or a weak one at best. To tie up so many things into one single plot is no mean achievement and Kamal does it without any glaring logical inconsistency. The character of Rangaraja Nambi though the strongest of the lot may be touted as the weakest link. Srikanth defends it with a rebirth angle, which seems to hold credence but seems a bit forced .If true however, it offers delicious parallels between the two characters, 4 if you include that of Asin. The highly religious Rangarajan countered by the atheist Govind, Rangarajan's love for the idol and Govind's looking at it as a mere container of the vial. At the end of the day both there lives become intricately connected with the idols and while Rangarajan while being a firm believer drowns with the God he so loves, Govind is saved by the fact that the idol serves as the safe carrier of the vial and therefore in a sense it is God who comes to his rescue. Asin's parallel's though not as intriguing still makes for interesting interpretations in the way she puts her love for Nambi ahead of the idol in the first place and in the latest avatar she puts the idol before anything else.

If one were to rate Kamal's characters right on top would be that of Fletcher. His mannerisms and body language are top notch and on par with any villain of Hollywood, though some may claim its more inspired than on par, it still is quite a big achievement to carry it off with as much elan as he does. Pairing up with him, in more sense than one is Mallika Sherawat as Jasmine a rather needless character and perhaps the poorest casting of the lot, commercial compulsions being the only possible reason. Both Fletcher and Jasmine are ex CIA agents. Is Kamal trying to make a point here?

Balram Naidu provides tremendous comic relief and showcases Kamal's mastery over comic timing and few of his dialogues have the Crazy Mohan touch to them especially "Osama Bin Ladder" and "Rao odha Rao a sendhu.. " . Kamal does not seem to be able to shirk off the influence of his long time comedy dialogue writer. His interactions with his assistant Appa Rao are reminiscent of the Janakaraj comedy track in Aboorva Sagadorargal.

Another character with heavy influence from Kamal's past movies is Vincent Poovaragan who reminds you of his character in Anbe Sivam, especially the scene where he goes in for talks with P Vasu (yet another disastrous acting performance from him). Though much loved, his link with the main plot is a thin thread. Perhaps one of the wasted characters but Kamal is likely to get away with this one because of the serious role ascribed to Vincent. "Nee enna ulaga Nayagana? " is needless self glorification as much as he tries to cover it up with the ensuing dialogue of how each one is an ulaga nayagan by himself.

Krishnaveni Paati will possibly go down as the most trivial and needless roles that Kamal has essayed in this movie despite him giving it importance to her as the person instrumental in starting the second round of lets-chase-the-vial. Khalifullah Khan as the giant with a kind heart is used to stress upon the viewer the fallacies of the prejudiced view of all Muslims being anti-nationalistic. Shingen Narahasi is used better than expected and his climax fight with Fletcher is perhaps one of the highlights of the movie. And Avatar Singh is perhaps one of the most contrived of the characters. Jayapradha as his loving wife though, is a casting coup. She fits into the role with ease and her dance with Kamal at the end showing how much grace she still retains.

George Bush is the surprise package of the movie. While one expected it to be just a role for the sake of number count, Kamal uses it to rip Bush apart. Right from his faltering speech in the press conference to his enquiry on the possibility of using the Nuke to counter the Bio weapon, Kamal portrays him as the George Bush we'd all love to see , a head of state with little intelligence and even less common sense.

Kamal's performance as Govind, the protagonist can be described in one word, neat.

Of the others, and there are so many of them, only Asin has an extended role and she does justice to it. Her incessant insisting about the need to keep the idol and keep it clean, though irritating set the tone for most of the God vs No God debate and therefore can be excused.

The most noteworthy contribution from Kamal apart from the story and screen play are the dialogues. Witty at times, thought provoking most of the times, they are succinct and full marks to him for avoiding any long lectures, which would have seemed only natural given the heaviness of the topics he's handled. All the dialogues revolving around God are especially noteworthy for their overall neutrality, as at the end of the film neither theism or atheism are claimed to be the superior philosophy. The lyrics department comes out with flying colours with both Kallai Mattum and Oh Oh Sanam being top draw stuff. Himesh's music is seemed to be made better with the visuals and Devi Shri Prasad's background score is neat with him working well within his limitations. It neither adds tremendously to the on screen happenings nor does it distract the viewer. Computer graphics are the biggest let down and at times look very amateurish. Scenes involving one or more Kamals are without any hitch though. The camera work is good enough in most parts and particularly good in the action sequences.

There are a few gems which stand out in the movie and among them is the idea to not involve Govind in the climax but instead let Narahasi and Fletcher fight it out. To have Narahasi, a Japanese point out the arrival of the Tsunami stands out for the thinking involved. And are the birds flying overhead in the climax just an indicator for morning or has Kamal put in the concept of animals and birds sensing natural disasters earlier? I wouldn't bet against the second possibility. "remember Hiroshima.. " lines are outstanding and so are Fletcher's last words. The fact that the boat in which Govind, Asin and Narahasi and the all important idol take refuge in, lands up in a church seems to tell us that God is one, across all religions.

As Srikanth has claimed, Kamal has portrayed Rangarajan Nambi as a sort of a Jesus Christ and this is an interpretation which puzzles me. Also among the many tiny loopholes are the amount of time which seems to lapse between the concert and the Tsunami. Too little seems to have happened to justify 8 hours. Also how does Kalifullah seem to know that Govind has to be protected against Fletcher and how can Balram Naidu not enquire more about the two people who had saved Kalifullah's family especially after K R Vijaya's claims that they were a couple? How the little boy from the Muslim family escapes from Fletcher is also not shown clearly enough. The mix up of the ice boxes in the lift is too contrived and just about passes muster. Also we understand that a butterfly's flutter can cause extensive changes elsewhere in the world, but to keep reminding us with that butterfly on the screen is too much in the face. Agreed that here it is India which saves the world, but so many Indian flags in the background and one of them piercing Fletcher's body proves to an overdose. Asin's sudden love for Kamal and Kamal's affection towards Asin also seems too sudden.

One of the recurring themes of the movie seem to be the good arising out of the bad. Be it the most vital destruction of the vial's constituents due to the tsunami or P Vasu turning into a good man after Poovaragan's death. You notice this again when Avatar Singh's cancer is removed due to the bullet wound and Krishnaveni paati's stress release on seeing Poovaragan's dead body. It can yet again be seen when Nagesh proclaims that had they not been taken for questioning inside the mosque they wouldn't have survived the tsunami. To have Kamal and Asin unite at the beach with all the gloom in the background seems to show that life must move on despite the tragedies which happen around us and maybe even to us.

On the whole, as is this review, the movie is about one man, Kamal Hassan and in this it is easy to forget the fact that the director of the movie is in fact a one Mr K.S. Ravikumar seems inconsequential. But again,as in most Kamal movies it is Kamal's influence which is paramount and not regrettably so. He chooses to explore chaos theory and throws in questions of and about scientific ethics, religion, destruction of environment, the prejudiced views against the Muslims of the world post 9/11 and much more. He just about does enough justice to each of these causes. and all of this in the midst of a chase story. Thankfully this is no wild goose chase.

His Highness Himalayas

2008-06-17T16:12:00.010+05:30

The other day in the course of a chat with Srikanth, he suggested that I add a few pics to spice up my blog. I declined saying it'll be akin to using "item numbers" in movies. However in order that I try something different, I have chosen to have a photoblog, a la musical. So i present to you a few photographs taken during my recent visit to a couple of hill stations in northern India.

India's answer to the Golden Gate. Considering we have answered every other gate like Watergate, Camillagate. Monicagate etc this was only due.

What you see in the picture plain rice kept in the vessels being cooked in the hot water springs at Manikaran, a place revered by Sikhs and Hindus alike. This cooked rice is the served at the Gurudwara. The pic below is the Shiva idol in the temple. The rising steam can be clearly seen. The associated legend can be found here.

Wherever you go traffic jams follow. A clear illustration are the photographs below. This one was due to a landslide the previous day which had transformed the already single lane roads into half lane ones at places.

In the above picture focus somewhere in the middle. You'll see a line of small white dots. Those aren't rocks but cars and buses. The advantages of almost all vehicles belonging to travel agencies being white, they present a great picture even during traffic jams.

And while the human beings were suffering from bouts of hunger arising out of staying stuck in the jam for 8 hours, the horses had their fill.

Talk of each photograph speaking a 1000 words, the following speak a million and in turn leave you speechless. (atleast for me. lol. )

And while most of our activities usually begin with a prayer to Lord Ganesha this blog will end with one. Fondly labelled, by myself, as the Kit Kat Pillayar, this is what arose out of fiddling around with a kit kat wrapper.

Murphy's Paradox

2008-06-12T11:43:00.006+05:30

If laws were to be proved, then Murphy's Law would not stand a chance, for if we tried to prove it right then whatever can go wrong will, and we'll never end up proving it. So would it be safer to label it as Murphy's axiom instead?

Picture (im)perfect

2008-06-04T22:14:00.004+05:30

If you had watched the broadcast of Andrum Indrum Endrum, Illayaraja's live performance in Chennai a year back, on Jaya TV I am sure you will have been haunted by that lovely tune they played each time they went for an ad break. It was Ilayaraja at his mesmeresing best, not exactly a rare occasion, but almost always a breathtaking one. If however I were to ask you which movie the song appears in, I am sure you would draw a blank. I chanced upon the video while skipping through the channels, on Sun Music of course, and trust me I was totally taken aback. Waltzing, kidding of course, it can be described as walking at best, to that tune was Vijayakanth at his young and dashing best, kidding again, and a heroine whose vivacious face and curvaceous body, sorry couldn't resist it (i meant the kidding part) , left me wondering how she wasn't touted as Kollywood's answer to Parveen Babi. And the name of the movie: Auto Raja. Pretty sure that the makers of the movie Auto had this name in mind before having to settle for a more mundane Oram Po, thanks to Kalignar's tax sop to all movies titled completely in Tamizh. That he forgot to mention which dailect of Tamizh and the wonderfully creative titles which came up because of this ruling is another story altogether.

Coming back to the issue of the picturisation of the above mentioned song, it is indeed a sad situation that this is not limited to just this song but to almost all of Illayaraja's classics. Atleast in the times of MSV and before there was never a great effort made because the tunes were simple and the lyrics all powerful. Though the lyrics remained equally poignant through Illayaraja's times, the directors decided that mere walking around wouldn't be enough and they had to jazz it up with dance routines. While the intentions may have been honest,the songs suffered. Often these days, I find myself hurriedly switching channels when I come across an old Illayaraja song being aired because I do not want my love for the song be diminished by the jarring visual.

To repeatedly watch a Karthik or Murali, or even worse some unknown face, try horribly to match step with the tune is a punishment which I wouldn't wish even on my enemy. At times I wonder how Illayaraja could allow for such blasphemy. Here's a genius belting out one masterful tune after another, only for it to be picturized in such a ridiculous manner. Would he not possibly envy the Harris' and Yuvans of today whose songs are made to appear, pun intended, much better than they actually are. How Shankar might have handled a "mayanginen Solla thayanginen" or a "kadhal kasukadaya", if you haven't seen these songs on television blame it on the lack of visual appeal, is a rather intriguing thought. Would he have still gone for those gigantic sets or instead understood the innate brilliance of the song and kept the picturization simple and hence enhance its appeal? Would "podhuvaga en manasu.. " song include some umpteen jaw dropping moves if picturised on Vijayrather than the rustic feel given to it in the actual movie? These are questions which one might say are best left unanswered. One supposes its pretty much the same with Illayaraja's songs. One just wishes they had gone "unpicturized".

Branded Items Only

2008-06-02T02:02:00.005+05:30

Once on my way to school, a friend of mine , a year older than myself, asked a kid in 3rd standard from a rather affluent family what his favorite song in Alaipayuthey was. Pat came the answer " september maadham". Slightly taken aback my friend decided to ask just one more question, "have you seen the video?". The reply was not only an emphatic yes but also a naughty smile.

Give and take some exaggeration from the above story it still makes quite a .. story. No this is not a lecture on depreciating moral values in our society. This is about a term cinema critics use: the front benchers. Should a song with suggestive moves or shady lyrics appear in a movie these critics are ready to label it as an effort to please the front benchers. Do they mean to say that the people who sit in the 2nd row of the theatre have any different emotions and reactions to such a song from someone who has paid Rs. 150 and sits in cushioned chairs with his arms wrapped, protectively or otherwise, around his girlfriend. Isn't the baser emotions what the name suggests, something basic. Despite the rather negative connotation to it, its still the same for everyone, independent of the strata he/she belongs to.

To derogate the taste of those sitting in the front rows or to claim that the "back benchers" have a liking only for quality cinema reeks of arrogance and classist tendencies. One would like to ask those who pay in excess of 100 rupees for the movies they watch if they have seen movies from Iran, Korea or Mexico where some of the best and most wonderfully crafted movies are made. I haven't seen them but that doesn't mean I look down upon a Sandai or a Arasangam. If you don't like it, then no issues. But then to claim that one's taste is poor just because he/she finds the movie entertaining is to be judgmental without being practical. After all one man's liking can very well be the other person's dislike.

Another of the prejudices that these critics carry is to judge an "item number" by the director or the star cast. A Mani Ratnam movie item number will be described as tastefully done and providing refreshing change (remember the song in Bombay,? Any other director would have been lambasted while Mani Ratnam draws cheers). I have nothing against Mani Ratnam, in fact I would claim to be his ardent fan, but what irks me is the attitude of the critics and their elitist friends to item numbers. I am pretty sure that parents in posh Mumbai locals wouldn't mind their kids watching Mallika Sherawat belly dance in Guru but would have an issue with her item number, or any song rather, in another movie.

My understanding of the situation, and I would love to hear views, contradicting or otherwise, is that what you watch and appreciate depends on what the people around you would allow you to. In other words, while the tastes of individuals is independent of the strata of society, the appreciation, and I mean the open kind, is very much a reflection of the peer group. What decides whether you are impressed by something is whether it impresses the people you want to impress that you were impressed by that something. Too confusing? This is nothing compared to the tribulations of the guy sitting next to you in the theatre wondering whether he should clap and enjoy an item number or whether it'll reflect badly on him and therefore try and give the impression he's squirming in his seat. By the time he makes up his mind on either choice, the song would have been long over and all the time spent mulling over the options is a waste. Maybe now I understand why they say these songs are meant for the front benchers. They are the ones who derive maximum enjoyment from these songs. They are free of any inhibitions and all those considerations of what the person next to him/her feels. If only the critics would climb down from the false high pedestal they are sitting on and be more open minded in their evaluation of an item number.

One seat in the Cricket Theatre

2008-05-28T21:46:00.004+05:30

All the world's a stage exclaimed the most famous playwright of all time. Ask Lalit Modi about it and he'll readily agree. This may not be the greatest show on earth but it certainly comes close to being the greatest show in the cricket world. (to me the India v Pakistan WC 96 quarterfinal will remain as the numero uno on that count ). When Brendon Muccullum swiped all those sixes on the opening night little did he realize that he had just clapped and said "action" to signal the start of what one can truly claim as a cinematic experience, complete with scantily clad cheer girls, crying stars and rebellious superstars. The theatrics on the field and off it (the forced hug and make up picture of sreesanth and harbhajan complete with Farokh Engineer desperately trying to remain in the picture, will remain among the most comical images of the IPL) would have impressed many a veteran actor. To see the same foreigners who would crib about playing in India in the heat of April queue up to get their share of the pie is possibly the best indicator that money is the overriding factor in anything and everything. Maybe its time for Master Card to change their slogan.

One wouldn want to be left out of such a historic tournament and when the chance came for me to be part of the action, albeit in the sedentary role of a spectator I grabbed it. So on the 21st , with free tickets courtesy Sunil, and Aadi for company I stepped into the ground pretty apprehensive about whether I'll get my money's worth. Considering that the Royal Challengers were playing that was a pretty tough ask . In case anyone is wondering what money I am talking about, it is the time that I was investing in the exercise and I believe in Time is money concept. At least that way with so much time in hand I can feel like a millionaire. With a live concert by Tipu going on, getting into the mood wasn't too difficult and we settled down pretty fast. As the sky darkened threatening showers and then delivering on it, anxiety set in about whether the match would happen. Almost everyone had a prayer on their lips to get the clouds to go away (though at the end of the match the same people were suggesting that a rain would have ensured a better result for the CSK)

As the rains went away and the chances of a full match became brighter so did the faces of everyone around. After all you don't pay in the hundreds and thousands to watch the rainfall. As soon as the match started the whole stadium seemed to ride on new found energy. The best part, about this game atleast, revolved around song and dance. The songs blaring from the PA system and the dance routine of the rather excessively gyrating cheer leaders of Royal Challengers. With a costume that would first send the local politicians to their graves with their heart stopping moves, and then make them turn in them protesting against such "unacceptable public behaviour", they were the ones inducing life into a game which had long been done to death through boredom, thanks to inspid batting performances by both the teams.

Two things became very apparent to me sitting there in the ground. One, Dhoni is pretty much the biggest selling celebrity in Indian cricket at the moment. Despite a string of failures, from his bat and his team, the cheers which greeted everything from the announcement of his name, to his arrival at the toss, his fielding and his batting entry were unlike anything seen before in a cricket ground (except quite obviously Sachin and maybe Dada at the Eden Gardens). The icing on the cake was the song they played on the speakers when he came into bat, "Singam Pola Nadandu Varan chella perandi.. "(translated as "My grandson has the majestic walk of a lion")" from Dhool. One is not sure about the grandson part, but he well and truly seems to have become the most loved adopted son of Chennai.

The other fact which became very clear was that IPL is the biggest cricket success story of the decade. As much as I hate to admit it, (yes I am one of those so called "tradionalists" who'd prefer watching Shivnarine Chanderpaul battling England all alone on the final day of a test match) IPL has brought in amazing entertainment value to cricket. It makes one feel he's got his money's worth at the end of the day. Maybe Lalit Modi does deserve a pat on the back. After all this is the second big he has done for Indian television, the other being the rights holder for Fashion TV in India. Not surprising then that he has figured out that scantily clad women and cricket are a heady mix in India.

P.S Talking about heady mixes, it is worth mentioning that the man has been arrested and jailed on the accusation of possesing drugs (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lalit_modi) . That i guess just about proves that he's a seasoned campaigner when it comes to giving people a high.

Goodbye Henin

2008-05-15T23:53:00.005+05:30

The world's best backhand has ceased to exist. If ever there was a living proof for a pocket dynamo it was Justine Henin. At just over 5 ft, she was an anomaly in the modern world of women's tennis. As teen sensation after teen sensation came out of eastern Europe, she stood still at the very top of women's tennis.

While her compatriot from Belgium, Kim Clijsters seemed to prove that nice people can't be champions, Henin set about disproving it. There has hardly been any volume raised about her behaviour on court or off it. On the other hand, she's earned plaudits for the way she has handled herself in the midst of all her personal troubles. While she was distancing herself from her husband, she got closer to her immediate family and in the meanwhile found enough strength, mental and physical to win the French Open. Later the same year she went on to win the US Open without dropping a set, a phenomenal achievement considering she had to meet both the Williams sisters en route her victory.

Watching Henin in action was a lesson in graceful motion. Her backhand was one of a kind, and it might not be an overstatement to say it was better than Federer's. The crispness of the shot and the angles she created were to be seen both to be believed and to be stared at in disbelief. At a time when brutal power ruled the courts, she proved that brain counts for more than brawn. To claim that she was this era's Hingis would only do both the legends proud.

Through her playing years Henin has endeared herself to the both the paying public and the critics alike, a sign of a great champion. Its a pity that the world will no longer be her stage and we cannot rejoice in her achievements, for in her we all see a bit of us, the person who broke all stereotypes and emerged as a much loved much admired individual. Men's tennis might have a Nadal for a Federer, but there has never been a constant second to Henin, a true indicator of her stamina and resolve .

As she began to court success on a regular basis, her many detractors maintained she was just robot like and that took some sheen away from her victories. As time progressed however, the world saw more of her human side. Perhaps, the most touching moment of her career was in the course of her French Open victory last year. During the semi-final match, present in her box was a very special invitee, her coach Carlos Rodriguez'z son. Many times before she had claimed that if he wished her she would definitely win the match. That day was no different and her wave to him at the end of the match would be one of the most poignant memories in an illustrious career. We'll miss you, Goobye Henin!

makes me wonder..

2008-03-29T17:04:00.004+05:30

There isn't much of a difference between sports and games. In fact its the olympic games and not the Olympic sports.

But then why does gamesmanship have a negative connotation while sportsmanship is one of the most desirable qualities??

The Trigonometry of Love

2008-03-03T18:27:00.005+05:30

Sine Wave: The archetypical love story. The couple take some time to warm up to each other and reach their peak, but just as they start to relish the relationship it all comes down rapidly. Better than cosine in the sense that at least the couple end up where they started rather than down in the dumps.

Cosine Wave: The love at first sight story. It starts on a high. Unable to sustain the impetus it goes for a free fall.

Tan wave: The dream love story. It can't get better than this. After a slow start its a case of up, up and away. There is no stopping this wave and as the name reflects, it almost always seems tangential to the actual curve that one is on.

Cosecant wave: Married life maybe?? Marriages, they say, are made in heaven and it is only natural that this wave starts from somewhere there. And then things start degrading and its all downward for a while until it meets the sine wave. Here, realization strikes and efforts are made to make things better. Reward isn't too far away and soon things take a turn for the better and slowly but surely its back to where it all started, heaven.

Secant wave: " You cheated on me!! ". Those seem to be the words of battered half somewhere in the middle of the relationship. How else can you possibly explain the drastic change in the curve? A sudden jolt when the relationship reaches its heights, and in next to no time both of them are staring at the abyss. Despite forgiveness and conscious efforts to make things better it leaves both the parties involved scarred for life.

Cotangent wave: The fling. They came they saw and they captured each other, albeit briefly. Intense at the start it then takes a dramatic downward plunge. Somewhere in the course of the fall, this curve meets its happy cousin, the Tan curve but lessons aren't learnt and the fall continues unhindered.

P.S The above "analysis" has been done considering only one cycle of the curves starting from zero to pi. Detailed analysis considering the curves till infinity would be very similar to the above ones except for the Tangent or the Cotangent curve which maybe equated with the life cycle of a casanova.

In continuation with the last post

2008-01-06T15:30:00.001+05:30

Talks are also on between Australian players and CSI over whether or not the averages should be calculated keeping in mind the umpiring blunders. Australian players are claiming that these things should affect the averages because they believe these things will even out over a player's career span and in the case that certain people and teams are lucky enough to have things in their favor its not their fault, as such things do happen in the game of cricket.

Ricky Ponting is quoted as saying "Listen mate.. We got 10 lucky breaks in this match and if you look back at all the matches we have played over the last decade I am pretty sure it all evens out. You need to play cricket in the Right(ya, with a capital R) spirit mate". However he did not elaborate on what he meant by right spirit and whether standing your ground after gliding the ball into the wicket keeper's gloves and claiming a catch after having rested in briefly on Mother Earth (as if she didn't have enough burden already) would qualify as Right spirit. And also maybe crying foul when an opponent utters a word or two of aggression towards them when you've been doing this for years now. After all the game needs some cleaning up and racism will not be tolerated. Andrew Symonds in addition to being a good batsman, a decent bowler and a great fielder also seems to be in the team in his capacity to draw racist remarks from the opposition. So next time you say anything to the Australians, make sure you are facing away from Symonds lest they use it to their advantage.

Also, he claims, you get back what you give. The Aussies take good care of the neutral umpires when they visit down under and its only natural that they look to reciprocate such warm hospitality. Maybe BCCI, the richest board in the world, would do well to take note of this fact and treat the umpires well and bother about the players later. After all once the umpires make up their mind it doesn't matter whether the player is good or not or whether its out or not. All they have to do is show their finger at the right moments. As far as the Indian team is concerned they'll be justified in feeling they are at the recieving end of the wrong finger at the moment.

Scorecard changes and battle royale

2008-01-06T07:26:00.003+05:30

Following the post-mortem of the second Test match between India and Australia at the Sydney Cricket Ground the Cricket Statisticians Inc. (CSI) have decided to ring in a few changes to the scorecard. Now instead of just reading out team scores like 209 for 4, we'll be reading out individual scores in that manner. For instance Symonds' innings will go down in record books as 162 for 3, Hussey's as 145 for 2, Tendulkar 154 for one and Ponting 55 for one. This they say is necessary as they think this will be more revealing about the standards of umpiring in the match and would help in making sure the umpires involved are forced to take this to their graves. However, CSI has decided against it having any effects on averages as they feel this will be unfair on the modern day batsmen as the olden generations are likely to go unaffected due to lack of necessary documentation to apply the new rules to them. However, CSI has said that talks are on to try and fit in an additional column "Wickets Denied" to give some of the due credit to the aggrieved bowlers. Also on the anvil is the possibilty of using half an asterix to indicate when a batsman has been ruled out unfairly.

Another report coming in is about how the best of pals in the Indian team and partners in many run chases seem to be not in talking terms after altercations over who would partner Deepika Padukone. Of late both of them don't seem as chirpy on the cricket field seeming to indicate that they would rather focus their energies on settling this off field issue. It has taken on such draconic proportions that both Yuvraj and Dhoni, keen to spend as much time with Deepika are ensuring they don't stay on the crease for too long and give the least bit of advantage to the other. One only hopes that with Indian batting struggling Deepika tells them she'll prefer the one who performs better on the field. That would be the perfect script for the revival of their batting form.

How to name it (III)

2008-01-04T21:39:00.000+05:30

Moreover, considering that the "angel" was at that point in time inside the manger's room was a positive as far as PLC was considered. Suddenly he felt in a manner unlike any other he had experienced thus far. Was this what they called "Love"? Will this mean that he would soon one among the many who called up on the dial in shows of music channels daily, to either boast of their relationship or try and put forth the problems in their relationship to a couple of people who didn't look like psychologists but did a fairly decent job or convincing the world they are indeed love experts, if indeed there existed any. Quickly banishing these rather disturbing thoughts he knocked on the manager's door half expecting him to ask him to hang on outside for a while and also hear stifled laughs and giggles from inside.

Distracted by this totally new line of thought that his mind was taking, PLC missed the first time that the manager asked him to come in and it was only when a slightly agitated manager called out to him loud the next time did he look up with a jerk and the fashion of his entry into the room did absolutely nothing to instill any confidence in him. Sheepishly grinning and eyes scanning the room to catch sight of his lady love ( yes, by now at least he had made up his mind about what he thought of her. Her impression of him be damned, at least for now) he made quite a sight and very fortunately for him the manager decided to put it down to the normal bouts of nervousness that any new comer faces on the first day of office. With a pleasant smile on his face the manager made sure that PLC was feeling comfortable and the by now settled look on PLC face seemed to convince him that he had made the correct impact on the young man. Little did he know that the look on PLC's face was more due to his success in catching the attention of the other inhabitant of the room. By now PLC had decided that she would be the guardian angel in his life and would do quite a good job at it (and it is this impression of her on PLC's mind which helps establish her name as Guardian Angel Par Excellence or GAPE in short). His focus was more on how to make a good first impression on her rather than the manager and in this moment PLC represents many of the ordinary people who tend to get their object of focus wrong at critical moments. So while the manager was discussing details of his training, PLC was busy training his eyes to follow every little movement of GAPE.

All of a sudden and with a jerk similar to the one at the door PLC realized that he had missed out on a considerable part of his manager's discourse so far. And just as he was starting to get involved in the conversation the manager decided to wrap things up and asked PLC to make a move on and get himself acquainted with the others in the office room and especially TIC who would be his mentor during his early days at work. Considering that PLC was just taking his baby steps in the organization, he decided he could do with a close friend or two to guide him through this phase. Having no one he knew earlier working here, he was forced to go through the whole process of working towards a close friendship again. Desperate as he was to quicken the process ,he hit on the strategy that had seemingly worked so wonderfully for him earlier. He had always noticed that the more you reveal about yourself and your little secrets to someone the more they seemed to draw closer to you. Deciding that he knew enough of TIC (and more than enough of CCW) for him to begin a close relationship with him. He decided to fast track the process by letting TIC into the details of the happenings in the manger's cabin, seek help in figuring out what the manger could have told him and profess his liking for GAPE. The point that PLC missed was that while it's all well and good revealing your little crushes to someone whom you have known for a while and have built up quite a bit of trust with, it's dangerous to do the same with someone whom you barely know.

Musicals

2008-01-03T16:58:00.000+05:30

This is not about the mega budget dance and song extravaganzas which appear from time to time in Hollywood (and strangely is the description given to any Indian, or should I say Bollywood, movie in the western media). This is about the ones which last for barely a minute and appear on TV. Of late there have been quite a few commercials which have depended almost entirely on their music, to succeed. Two such which stand out and I guess this qualifies as success are strangely from the same field, mobile service providers: Airtel and Vodafone.

When, AR Rahman whose initial works include some memorable ad jingles, Leo coffee being one of them, signed up as brand ambassador for Airtel after having refused to enter the ad market till then, it caused a flutter in the industry. The question being raised was whether he was still in touch with the world of commercials to be able to churn out one more hit. He answered it in style with his theme for Airtel which , 3 or 4 years after its introduction, still creates an impact each time its on air. The sheer range of visuals it has accompanied and the perfect changes (though slight) made to the original to suit the mood, and yet not diluting the flavor of the original bears testimony to the brilliance of the composition.

Vodafone, from the Hutch days, though not boasting of a high profile composer ( at least not one I am aware of) has relied on its music to add immense value to its ads and has come out trumps. The "you and I" track remains one of the most hummable ad tunes in recent times , though sadly it is currently "out of circulation". The latest series of ads from Vodafone. on the additional services, are an absolute revelation. Highly imaginative and touching a chord with the common man in terms of the situations portrayed and yet managing to add on such a wonderful comic layer to it, is something not too many ads can boast of, certainly not those without any dialogues. This is where the accompanying music has played an amazing role, in the Art of Living ad more than the rest. The jingles manage to create a humor effect that has never been experienced before in such ads and with stupendous success.

If one were to draw a comparison between the advertisements of these two then one would have to say that while the Airtel jingle adds grandeur to majestic and moving visuals, the Vodafone ones create magic with, and not despite, their simplicity.

Quote uncouth

2008-01-03T16:11:00.000+05:30

Following the assassination of Benazir Bhutto the tv channels worked tirelessly, vying with each other towards providing a information hungry nation the latest form the ground in Pakistan as well as trying to increase eyeballs by getting political office bearers past and present to give their views on the dastardly act and its repercussions across the globe and more importantly, on India. The experts with their repetitive views did get boring after a while and it did help that no one was on for a prolonged period of time. Also helping the viewer stay glued were the slip of tongues and the like which the politicos managed.

Topping the charts was Natwar Singh, who in a bid to remain in the news (or at least on the news channels) seemed to have given his assent for an interview to quite a few news channels. So when Barkha Dutt asked him her first question pat came the reply: "May I know who am I talking to". Old age i guess. Retirement plans?

Next in line was former J&K CM and presently out of favor politcal heavyweight Farooq Abdullah. Though excusable his statement on how "Benazir Bhutto, India's former PM" death would affect relationships did nothing to boost the present day politician's image of one who talks, then thinks and finally denies the statement. A point worth noting is that Mr. Abdullah was very quick to correct himself on this.

Not to be left behind was Pranab Mukherjee, who holds the post which Natwar Singh so dearly wants, while reading his statement decided to be very correct and read the statement as"... comma ... ". I am unaware if this is the usual practice and if it is, excuse me. But that does not stop me from wondering why they do not take slightly more effort and make sure that full stops are also carefully noted down.

Adding to the fun were the editors at a couple of rival news channels who decided that since there was nothing much to differentiate in terms of content and the details regarding the assassination the least they could do is to use different weapons of attack, while one channel proclaimed it was a sniper which got Benazir, the other claimed it was an AK 47. In the end I guess it was neither. One only wishes that in their over eagerness to win the race for breaking news they do not bury the fundamental principle of journalism which is to ensure that the information being broadcast is correct. This is the very least that we expect from our media.

Parallelism

2008-01-03T15:29:00.000+05:30

Couldn help but wonder at how things have worked pretty similarly over the past year or so for Dravid and Ponting, the stars for India and Australia on India's tour down under. 2007 was the worst year for both with their year average hovering jus below 40, an utter disappointment to their legions of fans not to mention to the two legends themselves. Of considerable intrigue is their scores thus far in this series. Both of them failed to get going in the 1st test and now they have both manged to touch 50, in contrasting styles but with the same measure of luck. If this trend of tracking each other continues then one will have a tough time in picking whether we'd want simultaneous failures or for both of them to shine. Devil or the deep blue sea anyone?

The romance with Boxing day

2007-12-26T18:54:00.002+05:30

My connection with Boxing Day started 21 years ago to this date. Since God didn't deem me fit enough to be a Christmas present to the world, he chose the next best day or should I say the next day, to send me in. But as much as it adds significance to the day from a very personal point of view my looking forward to the 26th of December has been due a whole different reason altogether. And its pretty much the same reason why I get up at 5 every boxing day. Those religiously oriented might assume that it's because of my sense of duty towards God and my eagerness to offer my prayers and thanks to Him. Close, my ritual is intended to pay my obeisance to the demi-gods on the cricket field. As the years have gone by, the Boxing Day tests have become occasions to celebrate the spirit of cricket. The overflowing crowds (and beer cans), their tremendous spirit and many memorable performances have gone a long way in making the occasion even grander.

Apparently the year I was born England trounced Australia by an innings and more. But guess that was just my amateurs luck rubbing on to the English team, for since then as much as millions of Brits would have wanted to see it happen again England have only been at the receiving end of such thrashings. Or as they say in many Tamizh films, "inime adhu nadakannumna oruthan porandu daan varanum". I have done my bit and now look forward to someone else sharing that burden.

The memories of the cold morning of 1999 when India were facing the heat down under while I was praying feverishly at the local temple, more for my sake than the Indian teams I should admit. It was also the debut of Brett Lee who ensured, at that point of time that is, that Rahul Dravid's worst record was in Australia and also as a side job just about end Sadagapon Ramesh's test career with a brutal bouncer. One more heart break was due 4 years later when despite a Sehwag blitzkrieg on Boxing Day India managed to perform to perfection the art of losing test matches away from home despite a brilliant start (Sehwag himself has "starred" in two of these defeats, the other one being on debut against South Africa). The tales of the other teams to tour recently are no different and India can look to take heart from the dismal performances of the others in recent times.

As they often say past is past and a new beginning is what was made today under the guiding light of the "Grand Old Warrior (man is too small a term to be used to describe him)" of Indian cricket, Anil Kumble. To say the least he made my day today. It was sheer delight watching him operate today and his celebration which followed each of wickets was similar to that of a rookie earning his first Test wicket. And looking at his celebrations I just couldn't help wonder whether the number next to the age column was just that, a mere number. It is with these thoughts that I look forward to what the future holds for me rather than look back at the 21 years behind me.

Billa 2007 - Fashionable Faux Pax

2007-12-15T18:49:00.000+05:30

Its never easy to remake a classic. Don and Billa might not have been classics according to the critics but for millions of fan across the nation (which would exclude me for I have not seen Don or recollect having seen Billa either) those two movies touched a chord and elevated the status of their lead actors from that of stars to super stars. Thus having such a big precedent to follow one should be aware nothing short of excellent cinema would satisfy the cinema goer. As already established I have not watched the earlier movies which though putting me at a disadvantage when attempting to compare the movies or the stars gives me the advantage of a perspective that most of Tamil Nadu wouldn't have.

Watching a movie on the 1st day brings with it two aspects- one positive and the other negative. The atmosphere tends to be pretty charged for you have some of the most ardent fans of the star in attendance but the price you need to be prepared to pay is that you'll not be able to hear much of the dialogues for the first few minutes or maybe more. With the fear of having to maybe miss out on a few dialogues I entered the theatre. The mad scenes that one witnessed while having to force entry to the theatre proved to be a little misleading as once inside there was little noise and whatever little there was of it was only at the start. As the movie progressed the only noise one could hear was tones of discontent.

The start of the movie pretty much set the tone the rest of the movie. Extremely stylishly shot, Ajit at his dashing best and minimal dialogues. In a way the decision to have as less dialogues as possible seems to have either been taken with some foresight or forced upon them by the utter inability to come up with good lines. The strength of any movie lies in its dialogues and more so a movie which relies quite heavily on packing a punch with minimal dialogues and that's the biggest failing of Billa. Only once in a blue moon did that really mood lifting dialogue come by and the one about Lord Subrahmanya was certainly the stand out. Another negative point is that throughout the movie one is unable to feel any emotion towards any of the characters. To portray a character as aloof in nature is one thing but it not even remotely connecting with the audience is another.

It's all fine to say that movie's do not reflect reality and therefore need not always be logical. But Vishnu Vardhan carries it too far as there is absolutely no sense in any part of the movie. Be it the way that Nayanthara, a total stranger is inducted into the group with absolutely no back ground check done (for a gang thats supposedly been chased by police in over 11 countries one would think that its a rather basic thing to do) or the way in which Velu's escape has been depicted, no sequence in the movie is completely logical. As comforting as it is to know that the Malaysian police are as inefficient as our own, as per Tamil cinema i.e, its rather stupid to think that an officer who's been carrying a pen drive with him for days wouldn't have as much sense to copy its contents on to his computer rather than fight about having it hand it over after the above said period. The director has thrown logic to the winds at all points of the movie and this is an insult to the intelligence of the viewer.

In the matter of individual performances there's very little to comment on. Prabhu as DSP Jai tries to utilize his vast acting experience but yet again fails short of delivering that one good performance that we can rightfully expect from him. Raghuman though appearing in very few scenes seems to have understood the limitaions of the role and performed as the scope provided for him has allowed. The less said about the sidekicks of Billa the better for all they seem to do is just stand next to their Don with the the same supposedly serious look on their faces. "Ranjith" is the only one who seems to have gotten a chance to display some acting skills and he doesn't quite make an impact. Santhanam who had put in good performances in a few recent movies totally disappoints.

When you have Nayanthara and Namitha for heroines one expects the competition between them to be pretty hot but at the end of the show its pretty clear who has come up trumps. Though Namitha's role isn't as much a damp squib as it was in Azhagiya Tamizh Magan she'll still be pretty disappointed at the screen time she's managed here though the screen space she occupies is another problem altogether. Nayanthara on the other hand sets the screen on fire each time she enters and its tough trying to split points between Anu Vardhan for the sexy apparel she's chosen (at times bordering on the bold) or Nayanthara who seems to have worked out overtime to fit into those. Scorching every inch of the frame she occupied she gave quite a few fans in the theatre enough reason to believe they had gotten their money's worth. As far as histrionics go both of them are pretty much on even keel with nothing much to show unlike the costumes they sported.

Ajith as Billa and Velu comes up with a credible performance but definitely not soul stirring. Displaying an icy cool that his character Billa demanded Ajit looks at his stylish best but does little more than mouth stupid dialogues and shoot at will. Complete with designer sunglasses this role does nothing to show us Ajith the actor but instead showcases Ajith at his handsome best. On the contrary Velu provides Ajith an opportunity to explore his comic timing and he seems to have got it as wrong as Dinesh Karthik against Pakistan. The line "enna koduma sir idhu" is now more or less guaranteed to invoke laughter or in the least a smile from the viewer but when Ajith utters the line to Prabhu, the man we owe all the fun to, it just falls flat and this more or less epitomises his failure at comedy. Maybe he could do with a lesson or two from the hero of the original Billa and our beloved superstar who has over the years mastered his comic timing. But of the two characters its Velu that endears at least a little to the viewer and this is perhaps the only success that the director and writer Vishnu Vardhan has managed.

The locales in the movie are simply stunning and the camera has captured them splendidly but then one gets the feeling this is more of the Malaysia- Truly Asia campaigns that we have seen so much of on tv. Its all right to pack a movie with stunning visuals but that alone doesn't make the movie. It needs a soul and in this regard Billa has nothing to bare. On the whole Billa seems more the work of a designer who has tried too hard to display all his wares. Thus, in more senses than one Billa is a fashion show gone horribly wrong.

Of Chappels and Declarations

2007-12-13T20:18:00.001+05:30

As one of the most ardent fans of Ian Chappel the critic, I lapped up every word of his on the issue of picking Sehwag for the Australian tour. Little did I realize then that there were 5 even more ardent fans of his, who have shown yet again that age isn't proportional to wisdom. If ever there was anything as playin right into the Aussie hands this is it. In a move a la bakra style the selectors have picked Sehwag virtualy out of nowhere. One does agree that the Indian domestic league isn't the best in the world in terms of reflecting the talent of the individual but it doesn help when the men who pick the national sqaud have absolutely no regard for the goings on there. On one hand we have Akash Chopra, a man who didn do too badly in the last Australian tour either, knocking on the door for a deserved call up to the team and Sehwag a man totally out of form. Maybe its the selectors who have suddenly gone out of touch with reality. One would like to them to remeber that only a few weeks back they dropped Rahul Dravid because he had not scored for 10 matches out of the 300 odd he's played and now to pick someone who barely averages double figures in Ranji trophy this season makes one squirm with disgust. Maybe its the selectors who need to be dropped because of lack of consistency. To make matters worse Sehwag has no place in the team. At a time when Dravid is being touted as a make shift opener to ensure Yuvraj finds a place in the team it reeks absolute callousness on the part of selectors to pick Sehwag who at 29 is not the kind who can tell the press about how much of a learning experience it was to be sharing the dressing room with the "seniors".

Next to the issue of the timing of the declaration in the last test against Pakistan onw wonders when these critics would stop asking people to do what they would never have done in their playing careers. It was indeed a refreshing change to see Mohinder Amarnath defending Kumble's decision during the match analysis on Neo. Here was one man who was more tuned to reality. The same critics who are after Kumble now would have lambasted him had Pakistan won. They would have wondered aloud as to why he had to take a chance when he could have done well enough to have sealed a 1-0 verdict. Maybe its all Kumble's doing. Had he not picked up those five wickets no one would have even thought that a victory would have been possible. To draw a small parallel one would be tempted to say that had he declared at lunch or earlier he would have done a Sreesanth, needless aggression, and by declaring when he did he displayed that remarkable facet of his, controlled aggression. And what's all this talk about what Australia would have done in a similar situation? One wonders how many times the Aussies haven't enforced the follow on in recent times just because of that very very special knock from Laxman at the Eden Gardens. Wouldn one term that as negative mindset? Maybe its time that there was a little bit more perspective in the views of a few of our legends rather than a rush to give their comments and be the 1st to say what everyone else might say. After all having played the game for so many years one would expect them to have a little more insight rather rthan hindsight.

Master and his Protege

2007-12-08T18:19:00.000+05:30

For a moment it wasn't clear who had gotten to his century, Yuvraj or Ganguly. When Yuvraj cracked one of the best hundreds seen in recent times with him at the crease, fittingly enough, was his mentor Saurav Ganguly. Friend, philosopher and guide are words that flow too easily through the words of young achievers when asked to describe their mentors but in this relationship each of these words ring true, though at different times.

Ask any Yuvraj detractor, a list growing shorter by the day and including several illustrious names like myself (lol) , the first thing that is agreed upon is that he's indeed a special talent. No objections raised. But it is in translating his talent to performances that he has been found wanting. And it was Saurav who kept his faith in him throughout his lean patches and defended him often in the face of harsh public criticism. Strangely enough , the major part of his successes have come under the captaincy of Rahul Dravid when Saurav was struggling to keep his plae in the team. But one is likely to believe that the foundation for the mental toughness that he displayed during those excruciatingly close run chases were laid during Saurav's tenure. This was the guiding part.

A very special feature of his innigs today was the grit, the determination to put to full use this one opportunity given to him in extremely fortuitous circumstances, with respet to him that is. The basic philosophy was the same for both the batsmen in the middle, to prove their worth to the team and to answer critics and a lot of them. That Yuvraj had with him at the other end, a man who has realized the value of each innings would have helped him immensely.

Through the innings and during that rightfully exuberant celebration one could see that the retaionship between Yuvraj and Ganguly had matured, much like Yuvi's strokeplay. If one though that it was still a guru sishya reltionship where a certain distance had to be maintained, the hug was clearly the indicator to the contrary. While Yuvi was soaking in the moment Ganguly could well have patted himself for finding the right prince to hand over his legacy.

The Prince is alive and kicking, long live the prince.

The Smiling Assassin

2007-12-03T13:03:00.000+05:30

"I meant to spin it one way and the ball went the other way," Muttiah Muralidaran 03/12/2007

That people, was Murail's answer to describe the delivery which got Collingwood out bowled and handed him, for at least an eternity, the record of Test cricket's highest wicket taker. And it is these words that best describe the man. Humility in the greatest moment of his life. What a man!

To understand how much he means to Sri Lanka as a nation one just needs to look at the series of stamps which have been released to commemorate this feat. All through the series of portraits one cannot miss the intensity of his eyes and the intent which it conveys. His geniality is expressed in his bowling and his love for the game in his wide grin. I say love, for passion is not the word. Passion is owed in some part to an external stimuli but love is totally from the inside. It was clear how much this meant to him, for the ever present grin just got wider and wider and it took a few minutes before some sense of calm returned to the playing arena.

It isn't often that you see children in school uniforms assemble in such big numbers to watch a test match and in this case I presume they even had the permission from their teachers to be absent themselves from school to see the wizard produce one of the most poignant moments in recent cricket history.

Warne might have been the the most charismatic of all the record holders, for he revelled in his excesses. He may have revived the art of spin bowling but Murali helped in redefining it. He may not have had the most beautiful action nor the smoothest run up but then his wrists are worth a museum display. The rip he gives the ball and the turn and bounce he extracts off the wicket are just a reflection of the extraordinary talent that he is.

The critics may claim that he owes his wickets to his dubious delivery action and in part to the number of test matches that he's played and wickets he's taken against Bangladesh and Zimbabwe. In all fairness to him and as he himself rightly pointed out its not his fault that Sri Lanka's itinerary are strewn with test matches against those teams. But if there's one thing which goes tremendously in favor of Murali its his record against India and in particular Tendulkar. He can claim to be the only spinner to have dominated against India and Indians will not forget too easily his destructive spells against them. On the other hand India remained as Warne's Achilles heel and this is something he'll have to carry with him to the grave. Warne's greatness lay in his craftiness and the way he worked towards getting a batsman out. On the other hand Murali believed in keeping it simple and his untiring approach was the key to his success. And it is this philosophy that has enabled him to maintain such poise when hounded by the critics.

In his unbridled enthusiasm and child like innocence cricket has found the character that its supposedly made for- the gentleman.

Confused

2007-10-20T16:08:00.001+05:30

Is there any word/phrase to define a state where you start to pen a few lines on as many topics as you can think of and then delete it without sparing a thought??

How to name it (II)

2007-10-13T23:34:00.000+05:30

Fighting bouts of nervousness and fits of boredom thanks to the continued drivel of CCW, impatience set in. As each passing second grew painfully and exponentially longer PLC was moved to the verge of taking his frustration out on CCW but given his presumed to be calm nature all he could manage was a shrug. As it so happened, at that particular moment CCW was narrating a rather painful experience of his and taking the shrug to be a display of sympathy from PLC, CCW continued his story with renewed vigor. As the tempo in CCW's narrative picked up PLC's shoulder dropped even lower. Yet again this act of PLC's co-incided with a part of CCW's story where his morale supposedly hits rock-bottom. If ever there was any law of conservation of Enthusiasm it was very much at play here. With each passing moment for every centimeter that PLC drooped there was a corresponding increase in the baritone levels of CCW.

At moments such as these, fate plays a rather defining role and this case was no different. With 5 minutes till left to go for his first meeting and apparently no escape from CCW, PLC was fast reaching his breaking point when in walked like (in the words of PLC) an angel who was the most beautiful thing God created on Earth. With his lips split apart wide enough for a Hot Wheels car to comfortably move in and park, PLC's eyes followed the new entrant all the way into the Manager's chamber. At this sight if the laws of biophysics had permitted his mouth would have split open even wider. However already having reached the elastic limits an attempt to open it further caused much hurt and with the realization that he was possibly already making a fool of himself he closed it shut like a Venus fly-trap going after its meal for the morning.

For all of CCW's involvement in the narration of his life story he couldn help but notice the change in PLC's stance. Being slightly dimwitted he was a little dumb founded as to how a guy who had shown such sympathy for some of his lesser sufferings seem so visibly excited on hearing about what he thought was the lowest moment of his life. And now for the first time PLC (or the second if you count the initial greetings) started to involve himself on the conversation. Impose would be a better word for over the next few minutes question after question was thrown to CCW about the manger. The answer to the first had revealed to PLC that the female who passed through was not the boss and this was followed by a huge sigh of relief for trying to go after a beautiful lady was one thing but going after the boss would have been pure sacrilege. Besides, chatting up with females was uncharted territory for PLC and he was no Columbus either. The next few questions directed to CCW were intended to figure who exactly this mystery female was. CCW being of the talkative nature, as established, however chose to launch into a totally not required tirade of words to start every answer. Time was running out for PLC.

As much as PLC had spent five minutes hoping to see his boss turn up and relieve him from the excruciating lectures from CCW, the sight of his fellow employees rising one by one to greet a tall, fairly dark complexioned, well dressed young man pained him now. It was pretty obvious that this young man was the manager and it was only left for CCW to confirm this fact by uttering the word "boss" twice in a hushed tone like a 5th standard student fearing a hiding should he get caught talking. Caught between his desire to continue interrogating CCW and the requirement to immediately rush into the manager's room, the choice though difficult was an obvious one for PLC to make. He trudged file in hand, into the room.

How to name it

2007-09-30T19:42:00.000+05:30

Preceded by whiff of fresh air, and followed by a stale smell resulting from an unwashed box of Thayir Sadam he had packed for lunch two days back Poor Little Chap (who shall henceforth be referred to as PLC) entered the office with a new found determination. He decided that he had had enough of being bullied around and taunted by almost everybody in the office. He had his group of his friends or so he wished. For he knew as well as they did that it was just a marriage of convenience.

The events of his first day at office was still so fresh in his mind. He had so looked forward to that day. The day he thought would change his life forever. He believed that this was destined to be the turning point in his life, a day which would start off the process of erasing all the forgettable memories he had accumulated through his rather "eventful" school and college life. The very thought of making new friends and acquaintances thrilled him. The first person he met was the guy who would later become his Tormentor-in-Chief ( and who will henceforth be called TIC) . Ah! There seemed to be such a natural bond. It was fate, he opined, that had delayed the introduction of such a character in his life. But, its better late than never. With all such thoughts randomly criss-crossing his mind he walked up cheerfully to TIC and what ensued was the typical first meeting. Handshakes and introductions later they were happily chatting about their respective pasts and how lucky they were to have managed a job in this company.

It was 830 in and the others started to trickle in to the office. Monday morning blues had suddenly seemed out of fashion for all around he could see so many cheerful faces. The previous night had played host to one of the most memorable moments in Indian sport. The first Olympic Gold from an independent event had finally arrived. And the fact that it came in wrestling, that oldest of Indian sports was a surprise and yet not as much a jolt as maybe if it had arrived in tennis, the latest fad amongst the dominant middle class. Not since Bhim had an Indian wrestled with so much energy and vigor, they exclaimed. One thing that never changes with us Indians is the hype which we manage to add to any notable achievement. He would get a reception that would rival that which the Indian cricket team got after they had won the T20 World Cup, beamed a television channel. A rival news channel quoted a "confidential yet reliable" source in stating that the Indian government would present a cheque of ten crores to the champion. An individual olympic gold medal is no mean achievement, but at some point we need to understand that a little bit of understated celebration would add much more value to a victory rather than frenzied reactions of euphoria.

PLC took one more look at the entrance hoping that his first day at the office would, cinema style, would also be the day when he would meet his lady love. Unfortunately in the harsh realities of the modern day world such fairy tale inspired thoughts do not bear fruit and it was with a concealed sense of disappointed that PLC trudged to his cubicle. Newly furnished and spacious to comfortably seat one person, a luxury in these times of cramped office spaces, his cubicle seemed to welcome him into a totally new world. He glanced at his watch, for maybe the 15th time in 5 minutes. Impatience was creeping in. He had to meet his boss, a unknown quantity to even those who had spent months with him in the office and to him he would remain an enigma, forever, at 9.

As he started to count each second down, his eyes fell on a guy who was glancing at him form time to time. Curiosity had gotten the better of him and it didn't seem likely to leave him anytime soon either. Desperate as PLC was to fast forward the ten minutes to his meeting, he decided to go up and speak to this curious co-worker(and as per tradition already established, this new character will also be henceforth be referred to by a shortened name reflecting his nature, CCW) of his.

to be continued....

Maiden attempt

2007-09-29T09:58:00.001+05:30

There are times, you wish there never was..
when the cocoons in your stomach,
decide its time for freedom and fly out..
your mind has a mind of its own..
the fingers seem to find a new rythm.,
as they move about with a new found sense of (un)purpose
and legs dance to a tune that you never thought existed,
but through all this the heart keeps beating,
as though nothing else was happening
how you wish you could afford to be like that..

Shave sahi.. tension nahi..

2007-09-16T22:44:00.002+05:30

It was a brief look at the mirror.. the fleeting glances at yourself that u so want to avoid.. those which u never wish u had to do as a 20 year old.. but u do come across situations when u have to "reflect" on urself.. this occasion, it was part of my routine before the dash to the lecture complex..

and there it was.. glaring and so obvious that u cudn miss it.. my month old beard was showin up pretty badly.. for 30 happy days I had put off the ritual of placing a razor on my cheeks and following it up with ten minutes of madness as it flew across the face at angles they never mentioned in geometry class and at speeds which will give light a complex.. the whole job had to be done quick, real quick.. the longer it drags the more painful it is..

they warn u at home... the first time u r so raring to go and take out every minuscule bit of hair u find on ur face they told u.. that all this will seem very exciting the first time but as time progresses u will grow to hate every moment of this practice.. ah.. how true were these words..

back then in ur age of innocence u never had to worry about such things.. life was so peaceful.. no worries about beards which irritated every ounce of flesh on your face.. but then there do come the times when u r very proud of it.. when u shape it ur delight.. the long side burns.. the goatee.. the french beard (though for me it was a disaster first time around and from then on its been a strict no no ) .. the best part always came a couple of days after you had wrenched out the beard.. the little sproutin called the stubble made u feel so good.. it gave you fresh hope.. that even beards can make you feel good...

but then the tragedy with beards occurs when you let them grow on you for too long.. initially u feel so good about it that the very thought of shaving makes u shudder.. and then follows a period of time when u let it grow, for u deem no harm can arise out of it.. this turns out to be the mistake.. for once u let it go past this period, it gets to ur nerves.. through the skin of ur face..

irritation sets in.. u think u r so much better off without it.. but by then it has become so much a part of you that u do not have the heart to remove it.. this is the time when the mistake magnifies into a blunder..

after all, not for nothin did our ancestors always maintain anything evil (in this case read: not good) should be weeded out.. not allowed to go past that stage.. once again pearls of wisdom ignored..

and as it happened to me today, there arises a new found vigor to shave.. to throw caution to the wind and go for the kill.. new found energy means a rush of blood in your hands.. and this translates into a rush of blood again, but only this time from a cut on the face.. a mark which no man likes to leave, for it shows complete lack of ability in what shud be deemed as each man's core competency.. most of the times the impression that the cut makes vanishes pretty quickly and this is usually followed by a big sigh of relief.. u'll be lucky if people do not notice either the cut mark or the sigh which follows a tad later..

but sometimes it leaves a scar.. each time u look at it, u repent the times when u could so easily have shaved it off but chose not to.. when the scar starts to hurt, u wish u never let the beard grow in the first place..

After today, I have 2 of those....

Airtel Anthem??

2007-08-16T19:36:00.000+05:30

On the occasion of our nations 60th anniversary of Independence, we have witnessed the ultimate insult to our national anthem No, its not some buffoonery on a stage when the national anthem is played. Its not even some one refusing to stand up to it while its being played or sleeping through it while on stage. It comes disguised as a show of respect to the national anthem.

To commemorate 50 years of Independence, AR Rahman and Bharatbala productions produced a remarkable tribute to the nation and its anthem through their compilation Jana Gana Mana. Very well placed intentions and a job which deserved all the credit it got. Ten years later the album makes a comeback a la Saurav Ganguly style. Here the credit should go to the media, though one can claim that after all they just did their usual job of hyping everything up. But on this occasion, we can pardon them, for the cause for which they have allocated screen time and space is a honorable one.

But then, at the end of a remarkably moving and poignant video comes a caption One billion people, One voice. My first thoughts on it was that it was an eyesore. Only when it played out fully and displayed the Airtel logo did the patriot in me rise, seething with anger. The demon in commercialization had just got its biggest victim yet. The national anthem. For all that one might argue that they are mere sponsors and therefore deserve to be mentioned, cool enough. But then the mention should be in that capacity only. Maybe a note of thanks to them for making this possible. The whole thing makes it look like they OWN the anthem. And what is it with a take off on the national anthem as caller tunes (JAYA HE) ?? A person choosing that as a caller tune is supposed to be displaying patriotism?? If so, that will be the most farcical of such displays. Anyone with an ounce of respect for the national anthem will twitch at this idea. For God's sake,leave the nationl anthem alone and not make it just another object to derive profit from.

Musical Journeys

2007-07-29T18:47:00.000+05:30

Rs 4.50 . The cost of the ticket from college to Chattram (supposedly the most happening place in Trichy). Its the worst time to travel in the city, Saturday evening. The traffic (yes Trichy isn't immune to it) is painful. The number of people in the bus can be calculated as total volume available/average volume of space occupied by a person +25 . The constant is to account for children who occupy lesser volumes, though there are men and women who more than make up for it and the 20 odd people who are footboarding at any point of time. By all means one would expect the mood in the bus to reflect irritation and uneasiness, constant bickering to support it and of course lots of cursing in low volumes about the uncle who keeps pushing people and trying to make more room for himself.

Lo and behold! The speakers start to crank up some noise. Slowly the music starts to drift into your ears. Hints of recognition strike the mind. And then the volume goes up and its that "kuthu" song from the super hit movie Dhool. People start drumming on whatever solid mass they can get their hands on. Its a pretty cacophonous atmosphere but then you can not help getting into the groove. Slowly and reluctantly your hands move towards the back of the seat in front of you and in a few moments you are totally in it. The song comes to an end and you wait impatiently for the next one to start. With these guys you never know the kind of collection. They can enthrall you with some of the best songs of all time or just squander the initiative and play a really arbid number and all the drumming will come to a sudden stop. This time however the theme seems to be the recent "kuthu" hits and everyone's happy to hum and drum along. No humdrum here though.

Normally one would be hoping for the journey to come an early end, but somehow the mood is so uplifting that you pray for the bus to get into a traffic snarl. However as it so happened the bus driver seemed as charged up as we were and put one heavy feet on the accelerator and appeared never to want to take it off. The destination was reached in double quick time and light years quicker than what i had hoped for.

May the person who thought of the whole idea of songs on buses live long.

P.S In the eventuality that the person is dead, may he enjoy the company of the apsaras in heaven.

Indian Cricket team bitten by Vadivel bug??

2007-06-29T16:38:00.000+05:30

Yes, we have credible evidence to believe so. The first hint was given by a report about Dinesh Karthik's unexpected call up to the Indian team for this world cup. The report says that Karthik, on receiving the news was so surprised by the decision that he refused to believe it. On the insistence of his parents, though , Karthik called up Vengsarkar and asked him "neenga enna vechu caamedy geemadi pannaleye??". Shortly after this we chanced upon a video of an interview of Karthik's opening partner Wasim Jaffer. When asked to reflect on his successful run of four consecutive non-zero single digit scores all he had to offer as a reply was a cry, Vadivel style ("Auuuwwwwwuuu").

Another incident which came to light recently only strengthened our suspicions. This time it was an incident from the 2003 WC. The first over of that final would forever be remembered for the flare up between Hayden and Zaheer Khan. When contacted about this earlier, Zaheer Khan had refused to divulge any details. However, recently when a reporter caught up with Mathew Hayden the whole matter came tumbling out. Apparently, after the first ball Zaheer Khan walked up to Mat and told him "Idhuvaraikum yaarum enna adichadilla". Amused by this preposterous claim Hayden shot back saying "Adhaan Ponna match adichen la??". Zaheer Khan, whose wit is reportedly quicker than his bowling, retorted "Adhu ponna match.. Na solradhu indha match"!!! The rest as they say is history ,for ,that would remain the only battle India would win on that day. Talking about World Cups, one man whose fortunes took a 180 degree turn between the two world cups was Pepsi Airtel Tendulkar. The joke in the dressing rooms around the world on this, also has the inevitable Vadivel touch to it. During the 2003 WC, whenever Tendulkar walked to the crease the opposition would be moaning "Vanduthaaya vanduthaaya". However the vicissitudes of fate so have it, that during this world cup, as soon as Tendulkar walked out of the pavilion into the ground, the opposition started celebrating the imminent fall of his wicket with cries of "kelambitaaaya Kelambitayaaa".

With our sights firmly set on what to do we decided to do delve deep into the matter. The first person we contacted in the Indian team was the swashbuckling Mahendra Singh Dhoni. He said that Vadivel had contributed a lot towards whatever little he had achieved so far. However, that's all that he would reveal. Next up was India's perennial hope for the future and Mr. Undependable, Yuvraj Singh. He too supported Dhoni's statement and was very much appreciative of the help that Vadivel had provided to them. And as if on cue he also refused to disclose much else. That kindled the investigative fire in us and as respectable journalists we had to get to the bottom of the issue. Sources, who did not wish to identified, (they wore monkey caps and mufflers while talking to us) came up with a couple of incidences which threw some light on the matter. On one occasion when Vadivel was visiting the camp Dhoni was, as usual, trying to show off his long locks to a couple of good looking females in the crowd. (Yes, we Indians ought to be the most stupid people to go watch a team in practice). Obviously miffed at Dhoni's behavior Vadivel walked up to him and taking out his comb said "enga kittayum mudi iruku, naangalum seevuvom". Taken aback at such a rebuke Dhoni decided to cut short his hair and lengthen his stay at the crease.

It also transpires that Yuvraj had gone to our man Friday and asked for advice. Vadivel in his usual inimitable style told him point blank "Un starting la nalla thaen irukku, aana un finising seriyille pa". These pearls of wisdom helped transform Yuvraj's batting more than what Greg Chappel and his team of biomedics and psychiatrists and physiologists and software engineers and chauffeurs could. What followed was a record breaking run of 17 consecutive victories while chasing a target and at the forefront were Vadivel's two protégés Dhoni and Yuvraj.

Even the seniors in the team do not seem to have escaped from this phenomenon. They were all praise for Vadivel and said they drew a lot of strength from him. When asked to elucidate, one of them said that despite some hard hitting and constant humiliation Vadivel still held his head high and took it all in his stride, and that is what they had also learned to do. They seem to be confused between movies and real life, which is only too obvious considering that they spend most of their time in front of the camera. Besides, their stint at the crease lasts just about as long as the ads that they star in. Ganguly for instance has resorted to the comedians hit line every time he gets hit while ducking for a ball pitched three yards in front of him. Totally believing in the adage "laughter is the best medicine" he looks at the bowler and says "Vendam!! Vallikudu!! Azhiduduvaen!!". But as with most things else, he seems to have misunderstood the saying. You need to be the one laughing for it to help and instead, not have everyone else laughing at you. In fact, that will add mental agony to the existing physical pain. But no one dare question Dada, for the fear that Calcutta might burn. (No! They do not have the practice of video taping it.. We'll leave that for Vivek to do)

Even the most senior statesman and always straight faced Kumble seems to like resorting to the comical punch lines. Young Piyush Chawla all eager to learn the tricks of the trade came jumping with enthusiasm to Jumbo. And guess what Kumbls says to him?? "Annen bomma trainnum, bomma planum vaangi vechuriken.. Adha vechu velaaandikittiru". A thoroughly bemused Chawla had no option but to join in in the boisterous laughter around the dressing room. The other bowlers too seem have at some point faced this treatment. A case in point being a match against South Africa. After Sreesanth got hit for 18 runs in the first over Dravid walks up to the batsman and pleads with him saying "No, Sreesanth paavam", Keeping this request in mind the batsman chose to play the next over from Sreesanth with totally unnecessary concentration and restraint. However, since the scoring rate had to be helped along they decide to go after India's number 2 bowler for the past decade, Ajit Agarkar. Having plundered a dozen runs in the over the contended batsman stroll towards each other for a mid pitch conference. Now, Dravid in a desperate bid to gain some respectability for his bowlers once again beseeches the batsmen, this time, not to go after Agarkar. Totally annoyed at these constant cries of the Indian captain they decided to go no holds barred and ended up with a total of 350 odd. At the end of the innings Dravid was left shaking his head remarking "Indian Bowling, total damage!".

Just when we were about to go to print with this unique story of comedian inspiring 11 other comedians, we got our theories confirmed. It came from the mouth of Dravid himself. At a post match conference after yet another loss (of face) in the World Cup, Dravid explained his team’s performance thus " padinoru peruma.. Summa suthi suthi maathi maathi adichaanga.. naangalum rosham vandhu adhikalaaamnu ponnapa avanga onnu sonnanga .. " ,a pause, raising expectations, "engala paarthu nala vanganu sollittaama". The dialogue delivery was so outstanding that all the press reporters ( and there were more of them than the crowd at the match) stood up and applauded. The resonating cheers reminded one of the atmosphere at Eden Gardens and for sure Dravid would have felt at home, in the otherwise hostile atmosphere.

At the end of all this we decided that we'll leave the final word to the hero of the story, (Vadivel's second such outing after 23m pulikesi). We put forward the question on how he felt to be respected and revered so much by the Indian cricket team. For once, even he seemed at a total loss of words and all that he (m)uttered was "Enna kodhuma Saar idhu??".

Political Mess(age)

2007-06-22T20:24:00.000+05:30

This is an era of political messes. Not just in India but everywhere across the globe. We have gaffes being committed by politicians cutting across nationalities. Recently, Obama was forced to apologize after his campaign team had distributed videos which showed Hillary Clinton in bad light. Another incident involved Sarkozy denying allegations that he was drunk while attending a press conference, besides stirring up a controversy with his holiday on a yatch, immediately following his victory.

Back home in India, blunders would be a more apt term for the acts that our politicians have time and again, showed they are capable of. Be it openly speaking against their own party policies (some might put it down to freedom of expression) or throwing baseless allegations against anyone who shows a semblance of opposition, they just about manage to take the cake.
But then as always one could with some introspection before jumping to any conclusion.

The media, which oscillates from playing helpful sidekick to dirt thrower, plays a major role in playing up these little bloopers. Ever ready for a sound byte and even more willing to get their hands on anything they seem worthy of a "Breaking News" tag, they follow absolutely no standards. With the number of news channels on the bloom the fight for the TRPs only get tougher. So, when anybody who's barely a somebody, says or does something that the society in general would not expect him/her to say/do, it's blown out of proportions. And in a media dominated world, the leaders and the hopefuls can seldom hope to neglect it. With this in mind they happily go on with their spin doctoring ways. But then with almost everyone more than eager to jump onto this bandwagon, space becomes a constraint. What follows is a merry go round, with today's favorites becoming tomorrow's whipping material.

Here's where it becomes difficult to pin point the actual defaulter. Is it the politician who commits the gaffe, mostly unintentional, or the media which is only too eager to highlight every such act?? After all, the politician is also another human being, despite his mostly debauched ways, and is entitled to make a mistake once in a while. The media on its part does its job of reporting news, though sometimes they are guilty of creating their own news.

A tough decision as it maybe, but like most things else ,the best way to settle the issue will be to put the blame on the politicians!!

All's Fair in Love and War

2007-06-22T09:58:00.001+05:30

A guy is spotted in a ladies hostel trying to get his hands on a Fair and Lovely tube. Another is "thankful" that there is something to take care of him or rather the colour of skin while he's at work. Whats' all this fuss about? Frankly it gives me a complex. Isn't brown a respectable and acceptable color anymore??

When a leading actor decides to play brand ambassador, its a surprising turn of events in a culture that has had a song extolling black, a national award winning one at that. It is only now that we men can possibly feel the angst that so many millions of women across the nation would have felt time and time again, when color was the reason for rejection and dejection. No, I am not playing feminist here. It's just the complex getting to me. Its pretty scary actually. Long gone are the days when men were referred to as dark and handsome. Its now dark and therefore not handsome. Songs like "Fear of the Dark" take on a totally new meaning. In all fairness, this is truly a dark age for colored people.

In a couple of generations people will be seen grafting white skin and couples will be altering the genes of the child in the womb, to make sure that it is born fair. A couple of centuries later kids will be queueing up in museums, to get a glimpse of the preserved body of the "dark" uncle. And maybe that's when the darker shade will make a spectacular comeback, for only when something goes totally out of vogue will it stand a chance to storm back into fashion. Isn't the seventies celebrated now in terms of fashion and culture. For all that you know, the Europeans might be first to convert to blacks and browns, tired of the homogeneity in their environs. And then we will try to ape them and start converting too. Maybe that's what it will take for colored people to be respected, for the native Americans and British to be colored themselves.

SIVAJI - The ????

2007-06-16T21:05:00.000+05:30

Eight hours,time taken to fully recover from the effects of watchin unfold on the giant screen, the most hyped tamizh movie of all time. The trailers were watched, dissected and analyzed for a clue as to what the movie would hold for us millions of expectant fans. Trust me, even after watching the movie I am clueless about the happenings in the movie.

It all started wonderfully well, the stylized super star logo and some hep music to go with it. And just when we were expecting him to air drop from a plane straight onto the picturesque landscape and start dancing to his intro song, Shankar surprises everyone with a drastically different intro scene, one of the few pats on the back that go to him. And then of course, all the hooting and whistling came when the super star made his first appearance on the screen.

From here till the interval its a Rajini-Vivek show. The superstar's comic timing standing out and Vivek providing perfect foil makes for some hilarious moments. And in the meanwhile our supposedlly "urbane" villain enters the film. One wonders what on earth made Shankar pick him for this role. It's frustrating to see Shankar totally mismanage his villain. The dialogue delivery is stupendously poor and the cooling glass seems to be there to do a cover up act of Suman's expressionless eyes. And one does have to say, the cooling glass does its job to perfection unlike Suman.

Shreya looks absolutely stunning and adds more than the requisite dose of glamour in the songs,which ooze class. The sets for Vaaji Vaaji and Sahana are mindblowing!! And the efforts that Rajini makes, with the help of his "mama" Vivek to capture her heart gives rise to some of the best moments in the movie. A special mention needs to be given to the banner which welcomes Shreya's family on their visit to our hero's place. In the midst of these light moments a teaser of the actual story is thrust in, lest one forgets what the movie is supposed to be about. The court scene where Rajni admits to his guilt makes absolutely no sense that too considering his defence attorney costs 20 lakhs . Either, the super lawyer doesn seem to have breifed Sivaji on how to face questions in a court of law or Shankar tries to give an image of Sivaji as next only to Gandhiji and Harischandra in trusting the power of truth. Nothing wrong with that, but coming as it does after all the tribulations where truth and correctness has done more harm than good to our hero, we would atleast like him to have some common sense.

The scenes leadin upto to the interval manage to create quite big expectations and the first scene after the interval only seems to convince us more that there are great things to come. On the contrary, the movie goes on a downward spiral that too after promising dizzying heights. What follows are a sequence of events which are very hard to put into words and even harder to digest.

Sivaji hits a goldmine by cashing into the black money of our leading politicians, industrialists, their personal secretaries etc etc. Now, he comes up with a scheme to convert all this black money into "white" so that he can put it to good use through his Sivaji foundations for constructiong hospitals, educaitonal institutes and industrial parks. Honest intentions but pathetic treatment by Shankar makes the whole matter seem like a stroll in the park. Also in the middle, rajni displays dazzling skills on his laptop, to uncover black money details, that would make Vijaykanth's antics with Widows Media Player look like childs play. It was never more easier for our Ministers,MLAs, Thalukdars and naatamais to be bashed up. The office room sequence is barely enjoyable once, but when its done thrice over it gets to the nerves. The fight sequences deserves special brickbats. One wonders whether scenes from Sultan. the upcomin animation flick about our Super star were flicked and a garb of reality tried to be cast on it. Though the first fight sequence manages to raise a few laughs the rest would barely deserve a mention.

By the time the climax arrives, weariness has already set in and Mottai Sivaji's irritating mannerism of playing percussion on his tonsured head is the final nail on the coffin. One wishes the director had used his head better.

The tale of two goals

2007-06-12T11:28:00.001+05:30

If a picture is worth a thousand words, the following video is worthy of an epic.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGmtIGUEGZY

Enjoy!!!

Reviewing the reviews

2007-05-23T19:10:00.000+05:30

Piping hot filter coffee on one hand and The Hindu's Friday review on the other, an awesome combo. I could no longer enjoy the first part when I left for NIT Trichy looking at 4 years of hostel life ahead of me. Then a couple of years later I lost interest in the second. As a matter of routine the reviews in the paper were becoming a farce. Any movie, barring a Vijayakanth(poor him) one, would be eulogized. Each storyline being touted as the next big thing in Tamil cinema. The histrionics of everyone from the lead actors to their parents and grand parents to the passerby who takes a curious peek into the ongoing fight scene appreciated to an extent even they would find too embarrassing. And then would follow the standard format of naming every technician and praising his role in the making of the movie. To be fair to the Hindu, its not just its reviews but those of the websites which seem to take this path.

The nadir to me were the reviews for the Thiruttu payale (Con man!!). To the unitiatated, it is a movie which at best entertains in parts. Mostly it turns into a display of skin rather than acting skills. With its share of twists and turns it made for a highly engrossing movie or so they said. What came to their rescue was the fact that the movie turned out to be a decent grosser at the box office. And this has been the case for quite a few movies that followed also, including another starring the same actor.

Now, where does this lead us to. When the reviews paint a rosy picture of any flick which releases, with the exception i have mentioned, it becomes difficult for the viewer to make a choice. In this melee even the movies which are actually good are not able to stand out in the reviews because of the same phrases and praise used here as with every other movie. Nowadays, when one wakes up Friday morning he can read the review with the same sarcasm as when viewing the flick endorsed in it.

Hairy Potter and his Earthly Hallows...

2007-05-20T20:55:00.000+05:30

Rafael Nadal b. Roger Federer 81(82 balls).

Clean bowled if the scoreboard would allow it. Who cares though?!! It doesn't matter how you exit when you have set the stage on fire for the time you occupied it. Not often does an in individual dominate world sport in a manner that Fedex has. Well, what is a statement of praise for the swiss fizz doing in an article dedicated to Nadal. Simple, one cannot look at his domination of clay by isolating Federer's domination of the game. Sample this, today was the first time that Roger has beaten Nadal on clay, and he still has a losing record overall against Nadal.

My assurances, this is not going to peter out to a now much repeated and heated debate of who's the better of the two or anything of the ilk. This's just an attempt to put in words a mammoth achievement. Across sports you'd find winning streaks extend for a dozen games maybe a couple. But 81?? Staggering! Critics can claim it was his favourite surface and not the world number one's favourite either. Even if were to play our favourite games in our backyards against a four year old and set our own rules this is not a number we can dream of. What makes Nadal's achievement even more special is that he has in the course of this winning marathon, streak is too minuscule a word for this, beaten the past masters of clay. Players who would pride themselves on their ability to go on forever just to win a single point. Guys who's cabinets contain multiple French Opens, and even more Masters tournaments on clay. And ya, he's also beaten a player touted to be the all-time greatest, not just once but enough times to prove that each of the earlier victories were not of the flash in the pan kind, if at all anybody still harbored any doubts.

Now, we come to a pertinent question. Where does this place in history, a treasure trove and a labyrinth at the same time. No one who takes a journey back in history of any sport return disappointed nor can he come with a clear picture of what he wqas looking for. Every great achievement carries a unique weight of its own. With this in mind, the simplest thing to do is to cease to be the judge and just take in the moment and leave the tougher part to the generations to come. In the mean time let's just lift the glasses as high as we can and raise a real big toast to Rafa.

Sleepless in Villupuram

2007-05-17T13:18:00.000+05:30

It was a dark and stormy night.. or so goes the supposedly worst start to a book possible. The weather condition that night was drastically different but my experience not far from the worst possible.

The second week of may isn't exactly the time to look forward to a train journey especially if you are in the southern parts of India an that too in the midst of the hottest summers in a long time. Guess "global warming" too has its share of favoritism. And having just finished yet another semester, successful or not is a question to be answered only when the results arrive, the hero of the story , (warning: in most future blogs this habit of referring to myself as the hero of the story will continue) has a rather filling dinner before boarding the train to push off to his hometown.

The dinner proves to be thirsty in the same measure as it was tasty. What that means is that our hero has a dreadful time sleeping. Not only is he damn thirsty but is also haunted by thirst in his dreams. This means a highly disturbed sleep before he finally awakens to his now dominant need for water over sleep. Now using the cell phone as a torch he focuses it on a face believing it be of his friend's, hoping thus, to wake the poor guy up to demand some water. As it happens the person whom i am trying to wake up wakes up in one of the other berths. Lucky to have escaped the wrath of the stranger our hero quenches his thirst, or so he thinks, and goes off to try catch some sleep. The train comes jerkily to a halt and its barely two hours (3 a.m) since the previous attempt to sleep and the thirst still unsatisfied. So, getting down from the train i discover that the halt is at villupuram. At that moment a vendor arrives selling hot milk. Seeing that as a possible solution to quench this seemingly eternal thirst, not the knowledge kind, the hero quickly gulps down the glass of milk.

Five minutes pass and the dreaded thirst comes out on top again. I was certainly losing this battle. At this point an enquiry about the nearest stall selling water results in me giving up any hope of buying water for the stall is apparently located at the opposite end of the platform. Given that no train stops for more than ten minutes at any station, I deem it too risky to try get down to the other end and be back again. Now, the wait begins for the train to start and increase the possibility of getting atleast some cool,chill will be asking too much, breeze blowing into the face. Five minutes pass and no sign of any attempt to get the train moving. Another enquiry for water follows and this time the reply is more reassuring revealing the possibility of a vendor selling water just a couple of coaches away. The search for this "vendor" turns futile. The thirst just gets more dominating. Patience, cried the inner soul, urging me to wait for just a couple of minutes for the "cool breeze".

Five minutes pass and the theories of the driver having slept off are doing the rounds, in my now restless and half unconscious mind. This is when the hero feels the need to get things moving. Well, my mind in a state described earlier orders me to make a dash for the water stall. What follows is a full speed run interspersed with tense sideways glance to check for an open door for me to jump into in the eventuality of the train decided to move it. Arriving at the stall our hero quickly grabs a bottle of water and starts the return leg of his run. For the next thirty seconds, my thirst takes a backseat, and instead the thoughts of getting back into the still dormant train take top priority. Once back in the safety of my seat i take in what will remain for some time to come, the sweetest tasting gulp of water.

Now, I decide to go out once again and take in the wonderful "view" which was earlier distorted by the need for water. And just as i was about to doze off on one of the benches outside, the horn blows. To me it sounded like the sound of trumpets at the time of victory. And so, the ordeal which seemed to last for eternity, something the reader of this post can surely relate to, finally came to an end.

Thanks...

2007-05-17T13:12:00.000+05:30

I would like to begin my new blog innings with a note of thanks to Google for ensuring that i would not have to look at my sins of the past each time i blog, by "forcibly" making me take to a new blog space. And one fervent wish too.. that Shastri be made permanent cricket manager, whatever that's supposed to mean, so that the cricket lovers can celebrate the comeback of ESPN Star into cricket broadcasting with a lot more happiness. Cheers!!!